One And Only
by KarinArson
Summary: AU Future Soldier!Blaine with Kurtbastian endgame. Kurt and Blaine are married with two children and are living together in a house in Lima, Ohio. Blaine is a soldier and gets shipped off to Iraq to fight. Kurt tries to survive without his loving husband and ends up getting a closer and closer friendship with Blaine's best friend Sebastian Smythe. Ratings may change
1. Chapter 1

_This fic is currently endgame Kurtbastian. I haven't introduced Sebastian in this chapter, but this is only the prologue so you just wait and see! _

_I was heavily inspired by the movie (haven't read the book) Brothers with Jake Gyllenhaal, Natalie Portman and Tobey Maguire. So this is basically something like that but with a twist and not the same kind of ending.. yeah, you're probably really confused right now so I'm gonna shut up. This is an AU Future Soldier!Blaine fic with Kurtbastian endgame. Give it a chance! LOVE YOU _

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One And Only.

Kurt held his husband close at the airport. It was fifteen minutes until Blaine would have to board the plane. The plane that would take him hundreds of miles from home. Hundreds of miles from Kurt. The plane that would take him to another world. A world where there was a big possibility that he might get killed. Kurt grasped his husband's sand-colored military jacket tightly and breathed in the familiar scent of his cologne.

Kurt felt a little hand tug at his pant-leg and quickly wiped his eyes with one hand before putting on his best show-face and turned to their children. "Yes, Daisy?" he smiled at their four year old daughter. She looked up at them with big confused hazel colored eyes. "Why are you crying papa?" she tilted her little head confused so that some of her dark brown curls fell down in her face.

Blaine chuckled and bent down to pick up his oldest child. "Me and papa are just a little sad that we have to be apart for so long" he explained. Daisy pouted and put her small fist on her father's cheek. "When are you coming home dada?". Blaine bit his lip and swallowed. He didn't know when he would be able to come home. The army was very strict with not allowing their soldiers to go home just on a whim. "I don't know sweetie." When Daisy's eyes started to water he quickly added "probably sometime before Christmas". Daisy smiled again "Are you going to be home for my birthday?". Blaine looked at his daughter's hopeful eyes and didn't have the heart to say no. "I'll try" he promised.

"Alright soldiers, ten minutes until boarding!" His captain shouted at the gathered soldiers with their families.

Kurt bit his lip to keep from screaming and crying in desperation. Blaine looked into the sad blue eyes of his loving husband and sighed. He put Daisy down and stepped up to Kurt. He wrapped his arms around him again and whispered into his neck "I'll be back. I promise I'll be back". Kurt sniffled slightly before he pulled back and nodded. Blaine smiled as best as he could "I love you more than anything, you know that? You and Daisy and Michael are my everything". Kurt nodded once again and whispered "I love you too." He swallowed thickly before adding "please don't die. I don't think I can live without you". Blaine bit his lip to keep the tears from rolling down the cheek. He didn't say anything, he just nodded and kissed Kurt sweetly on the lips one last time.

When they pulled back they heard two small giggles and looked down at their children. Blaine quirked an eyebrow "What are you two laughing about?". Michael, their youngest child of only three years smiled hugely with one missing front tooth. "Papa and Dada kisses!" He said happily and jumped up and down. Kurt and Blaine chuckled and Blaine bent down so that he was –almost- on eyelevel with his son and daughter. "Be nice to Papa when I'm gone, ok?" They both nodded quickly which made Kurt chuckle silently. Blaine smiled "Good. Now, you understand why I am going away, right?" he looked them in the eyes to make sure that they understood. Daisy nodded but Michael looked confused. He tilted his little head and looked at his father with startling blue eyes. "Are you going on a vacation? Like we did last year with Uncle Finn and Aunt Rachel?". Blaine shook his head but smiled slightly "No buddy, I'm not going on a vacation. But you could kind of say that I'm going on a trip. I'm going to a country far away to work. I'm going to be working together with the people who wear the same kind of clothes as daddy does, do you see them?" he pointed towards some of the other soldiers and Michael nodded. "I'm going to work together with them for a long time and then when we're finished, I'm coming home to you guys again." He smiled. Michael frowned slightly and said with a broken voice "B-but that sounds like a really long time. I'm going to miss you daddy.." He looked down and bit his tiny bottom lip with tear filled eyes. Blaine took a deep breath and gathered both of his children in his arms before kissing them on top of their heads. He squeezed them gently and rocked them back and forth in his arms. "I'm going to miss you too, but this time apart is going to go by really fast. I promise. And it's ok if you miss me. You have Papa and Grandpa and Grandma and Uncle Sebastian and Uncle Finn and Auntie Rachel to talk and play with. You're going to have so much to do you won't have time to miss me." He smiled and looked at them again. Michael and Daisy both nodded and gave him one last hug each before pulling back.

Blaine stood up and gave Kurt on last kiss on the cheek before he grabbed his army-colored bag and walked off to where the other soldiers had gathered and prepared to board the plane.

Kurt lifted up his son and daughter in his arms so that they would be able to see their father properly when he entered the plane.

Blaine walked up the stairs to the plane and turned around at the top just in front of the airplane door. He waved at his little family with a huge smile and a mouthed 'I love you' to Kurt before he disappeared.

Kurt closed his eyes and buried his face in the neck of his daughter. They watched the plane roll down the runway, gather speed and finally fly away among the clouds. Michael and Daisy squealed and laughed loudly while they waved their small arms furiously.

When they walked out to their car, Kurt put on his most convincing smile and said with an excited voice "Who's in the mood for some ice cream?". Both Daisy and Michael squealed and jumped up and down while chanting 'Me Me Me Me!'

Kurt knew that this was the beginning of a new chapter in their lives. He just didn't know if it was good or bad yet.

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**Author's Note**

**Like it? Hate it? Wanna Beta it? Lol.**

**I'm not desperate for reviews, but it would be nice to know if I should continue it or not.**


	2. Chapter 2

_Hey, here's the first real chapter of One And Only! I'm really happy to see that there actually are people who read the preview and even a few who is now following this story. WOW! This is my very first fic and it just warms my heart to get positive responses. _

_And guess what? Chapter 1 = Sebastian enters. Exciting, huh? ;) haha. _

_And I forgot to this in the preview. Distclaimer: I don't own Glee, Blaine, Kurt, Sebastian, Burt, Carole, Finn, Rachel, or all the other things that you might recognize._

_And by the way, the name of the story comes from Adele's amazing song One And Only. It's one of my all time favorite songs and I listen to it a lot when I write this story. _

_Now, sit back and enjoy!_

* * *

It was Sunday.

The first Sunday since Blaine left.

Sebastian stood outside the Hummel-Anderson household, warming his hands in his jeans pockets and worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. It was surprisingly cool in the early October air this morning.

Sebastian glanced down at his wristwatch and sighed. It read 08.47. He and Blaine had a tradition of taking Kurt's and Blaine's children to the park every Sunday morning while drinking coffee.

It took a lot of changing on Sebastian's part to be able to call himself Blaine's friend. He was a jerk to both him and Kurt in high school, but after Sebastian was kicked out of his parent's house (his mom had walked in on one too many of his… conquests) and was forced to live with his alcoholic uncle, he realized that he needed to change and that he could use all the friends he got. That's how he and Blaine had slowly become best friends.

He never got that close friendship with Kurt. Sure, they were pleasant and civilized towards each other but they rarely hung out just the two of them and the air had always a hint of awkwardness when they spoke to each other.

That is why he now stood outside Kurt and Blaine's door this Sunday morning instead of already being inside playing with Daisy and Michael.

He had promised both Blaine and the kids that he still would come around the house at least once a week to play with his favorite niece and nephew (they weren't really related, but that was as close as he got to a family nowadays) while Blaine was in Iraq.

"Fuck, stop being such a coward. He's not going to throw you out just because Blaine's not here." Sebastian muttered to himself before he rang the doorbell.

He took a deep breath to calm his nerves just as the door opened to reveal Kurt in an apron. "Sebastian, hi." He smiled and wiped his hands on his apron.

"Hi Kurt. Sorry if it's a bad time, I just thought that I could take the Daisy and Michael to the park or something."

Kurt just raised an eyebrow curiously before stepping aside and gestured for Sebastian to come in. "Sure that sounds like a good idea. I haven't had time to take them to the park since Tuesday. I bet they're just aching to play on the swing set." He chuckled.

Sebastian smiled and nodded before hearing a squeal from the top of the stairs. "Uncle Sebby!" Michael exclaimed before running down the stairs as fast as he could with his small legs and flung himself in Sebastian's waiting arms.

"Michael, what have I told you about running in the stairs?" Kurt asked his son sternly.

"Don't do it" Michael answered proudly.

Kurt nodded and tried to hide his amused smile. "Exactly. So tell me Michael, why were you running down the stairs?"

Michael's smile faltered and he stammered "B-but Uncle Sebby's here..."

Sebastian chuckled softly at that but stopped when he received one of Kurt's stern glares. "That's no excuse, mister" Kurt said.

"Sorry Papa" Michael said with a small voice and hugged Sebastian closer around his neck.

"It's alright, I just don't want you to get hurt baby" Kurt smiled and kissed his son on the cheek.

Michael giggled and turned so that he was facing Sebastian in his arms "Are you taking us to the park today?" he asked with big, hopeful eyes.

"Yes I am" Sebastian smiled. "Where is your sister?"

Michael rolled his eyes in a way that made him look so much like Kurt is was almost frightening. "She is having a fasso-crisis"

Sebastian frowned and was just about to ask what a 'fasso-crisis' was when Kurt said softly "he means a fashion-crisis. Apparently she has nothing to wear even though we bought her new clothes last week". He rolled his eyes fondly and Sebastian smiled because that was also such a Kurt thing to say. If he didn't know that Daisy was biologically Blaine's and Michael was biologically Kurt's he would be sure that Daisy were Kurt's because of her dramatic behavior.

"Michael, could you go tell your sister that she looks amazing in whatever she chooses to wear and that I am here to take you guys to the park?" Sebastian asked as he put Michael down on the floor. Michael sighed but nodded and started to slowly make his way upstairs to his sister's bedroom.

Kurt laughed softly and turned to Sebastian "it's really great of you to come over today even though Blaine's not here". His smile faltered with the last word but he swallowed and forced another smile on his face.

Sebastian just shrugged "It's not a big deal. I like hanging out with the little munchkins" He chuckled. "I mean, I never wanted kids for myself but those two-" He gestured with his thumb up the stairs "-, they got me wrapped around their little fingers".

Kurt smiled fondly "They're lucky to have you"

"I'm lucky to have them"

Kurt just nods when his children sprints down the stairs "No running in the stairs" he shouts. They immediately stop and walk as calmly as possible until they've reached the bottom step.

Daisy beams hugely when she reaches Sebastian and does a little spin with her red cotton tunic paired with black tights. "How do I look Uncle Sebby?

"Hmm…" Sebastian pretends to think and folds his arms above his chest while tapping his chin with one finger. "Do another spin for me please"

She does as she's told.

He thinks for another moment before smiling brightly "You look gorgeous Princess. I bet all the boys in kindergarten are drooling over you"

She rolls her eyes but beams at him "I hope not, that would be gross".

Sebastian laughs and picks her up "I bet you're going to change your mind in a few years and when you do, you can come to me. Remember that. There is no better person in the world to talk boys with… or girls" he winks at her and she just giggles.

He put her down again. "Right, let's go munchkins. If you're really nice I might buy you hot chocolate later."

Michael and Daisy cheers and quickly (with some help from Kurt and Sebastian) puts on their jackets and shoes before dashing out the door. Sebastian turns around in the doorway "Um, do you maybe want to come with us? It must be a bit boring just hanging around the house" he asks Kurt.

Kurt looks surprised for a moment before giving Sebastian a small smile. "Oh no, I actually have a few things that I need to take care of around the house. Thank you for the offer though".

Sebastian nods and starts to turn around

"Don't feed them too many sweets though." Kurt says after him. "Don't think that I don't know about how much ice cream and candy they get when it's just you and Blaine around" he teases with a smile.

Sebastian laughs softly. "I'll try to behave myself" he says with a smile before closing the door after him.

* * *

Kurt breathes a sigh of relief when the door closes. Truth be told, it would be nice to come with them to the park but he had to make a phone call and he didn't want Michael and Daisy to be around to hear him.

He sat down at the kitchen island after removing the apron around his waist and picked up the phone before dialing the number he knew by heart.

"Hummel Tires and Lube, how can I help you?"

Kurt smiled into the phone "Hi dad"

"Hey buddy, everything alright?" Kurt hears something that sounds like a door closing.

Kurt puts on a convincing smile even though his father can't see him. "Yeah, everything's fine" he says with a little too much cheer in his voice. He cringes at the sound of his own voice.

Burt sighs at the end of the line "This is about Blaine isn't it?"

Kurt swallows the lump in his throat and nods "Yeah…" he whispers.

"Listen buddy, he's going to be fine. I know I can't promise you that but trust me, I know that kid. He's gonna fight tooth and nail before he gives up. He has too much to lose."

"I know dad. It's just…" he trails off in a broken whisper. "I have dreams about him. About him dying. And... I don't know if I can survive without him dad" he feels a tear roll down his cheek and he sniffles quietly.

"I know it's hard buddy. But you have to stay strong. If not for you, then for Daisy and Michael."

Kurt nodded and wiped his eyes "yeah of course, you're right. I'm just being silly" he chuckles half-hearted.

"Hey, you're not silly. You're being human. It's only been five days since Blaine left and the first weeks are always the hardest without the person you love. What do you say to have dinner at our place tonight? It's been a while since we had a proper Hudmel-household dinner."

Kurt laughed softly. "Sure dad, that sounds great"

"Great. Is six a good time? Finn and Rachel usually comes around that time when we have dinner"

"Six is great. See you tonight dad. I love you"

"I love you too, kiddo"

They hang up and Kurt takes a deep breath before putting on his shoes and jacket. A day in the park might be just what he needs.

* * *

**And there you have it.. the first chapter of One and Only! Yaaaay!**


	3. Chapter 3

_Two chapters in less than 24 hours. I'm on a roll!_

_Ok, this might be confusing. I wrote as I posted the last chapter that it was the first chapter, but it says "Chapter two" so I thought 'whatever' and made this chapter three instead. The prologue is chapter one. Hah. There we go!_

_This is the part of the story where it becomes obvious where I found my inspiration. Some of the scenes I've written below are almost identical to the ones in the movie Brothers, but I put my own spin on it. I promise, the rest of the chapters won't be as identical to the movie as this one is, I just found this part so fitting with the characters and the story so I didn't want to screw it up by writing it completely from my fantasy._

_Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or any of the characters associated to Glee, nor do I own the storyline of the movie Brothers._

_I changed the ratings to T. I'm not very good at the whole ratings thing but I guess this story is not appropriate for children so I rated it T. It probably will change to M in later chapters._

_Warnings: ANGST. Character death and swearing._

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Chapter three.

Kurt ended up spending the day with Sebastian, Daisy and Michael in the park. He ended up spending a lot of Sundays together with them in the park. He was determined to keep up the everyday-traditions that included Blaine before he left, so that the kids wouldn't constantly have to think about the missing of one of their fathers. The time spent with Sebastian had definitely cleared up the awkwardness around them. They now considered themselves to be friends. Not as close as Sebastian and Blaine, but still friends.

Kurt and the kids had spent at least two nights a week at Burt and Carole's house. There, they had dinner together with Burt, Carole, Finn and Rachel. Finn had taken the part of comforting brother very seriously and called Kurt at least twice a day to check up on him. Kurt thought that it was very sweet that he showed his concern but when he sat in the middle of a conference it wasn't really appropriate to answer his phone. When he didn't answer his phone it made Finn worried and it all resulted in even more frantic phone calls from both him and Rachel.

It was now Wednesday and it had been two months since Blaine left. Finn and Kurt had just put Michael and Daisy to sleep and were not sitting on the large grey living room sofa chatting about life in general.

"Dude, it's like she expects me to just _know_ when she's having her period. How am I supposed to know? It's not like it runs on a schedule" Finn said exasperated.

Kurt quirked an eyebrow "It sort of does. But I understand what you mean"

"Thanks man. Ugh, chicks are so confusing." Finn rubbed his forehead and sighed.

Kurt just hummed in agreement and nodded.

"So... how are you doing?" Finn asked.

Kurt raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean? You talk to me at least twice a day, you probably know more about me than I do by now" he chuckled.

"I mean, how are you feeling?" He gestured towards Kurt in a sort of lame hand wave. "We only talk about Daisy and Michael and what you guys are doing. How do you feel?"

Kurt smiled tight-lipped "it's good. Well, as good as it can be" he nodded to himself. "It's better. The first week was horrible without Blaine, but it feels better now. I haven't received any letters yet, but Blaine told me that they probably won't have much time to write anyways"

"Is there anything else bothering you?"

Kurt looked into the eyes of his normally so daffy step-brother. Finn really had his moments of insight and it was those moments that made Kurt love him so much. "You really are a good brother Finn"

Finn just shrugged "That doesn't answer the question"

Kurt sighed. "It's Daisy's birthday in two weeks and I'm almost 100% positive that Blaine won't be able to come home then. It will break her heart"

Finn nodded "I understand little bro, but don't worry. We will throw her the best damn birthday party in the history of ever and she will be so happy that she will forget all about her daddy being gone." He finished with a triumphant smile.

Kurt chuckled and shook his head. "They are so spoiled"

"Nah, not as spoiled as my and Rachel's kid will be… I mean, if we ever get kids"

"That's probably true." Kurt laughed. Finn chuckled before sobering up his expression a bit.

"Do you get any help with the kids except from me and Mom and Burt?"

"Yeah, I've actually had a lot of help from Sebastian" He smiled. "It's weird, he's always been around in some way but I never got that personal connection with him. He's actually not as horrible as some people may think" he chuckled. "He comes around more often nowadays because he understands that I have other things to do except taking care of Michael and Daisy all day. It's really nice of him"

Finn nodded with a smile. "Yeah, Sebastian's cool."

They were silent for a few minutes before Kurt stood up and gestured towards the kitchen. "Do you want some coffee?"

Finn glanced down at his watch and shook his head "Nah, I should probably go home. Rachel will be furious if I'm late one more time this week"

Kurt laughed softly and followed Finn to the door.

Just as Finn was putting on his coat there was a knock on the door.

Finn looked at Kurt "Are you expecting company?"

Kurt just shrugged "No". He opened the door to reveal two middle-aged men clad in navy army uniforms with white gloves and white hats held in their hands.

Kurt understood immediately why they were there. He couldn't breathe. His eyes filled with tears and he gripped a tight hold on the sleeve of Finn's jacket.

"Mr. Hummel-Anderson?" The older of the two asked.

Kurt nodded shakily while tears started rolling down his cheek "M-mhm"

"Can we come in?" The older man asked carefully.

Kurt just nodded and walked in to the living room again. He sat down on the sofa and let Finn make sure that the officers found their way in. Kurt stared down on the carpet numbly until he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up and found Finn sitting next to him with a sad expression and the two officers sitting in the love seat next to them.

"Mr. Hummel-Anderson, we are very sorry to inform you that your husband, Blaine Hummel-Anderson has been killed in service. His plane was shot down over the ocean and no bodies were found." He cleared his throat "We are very sorry for your loss and we will of course help you organize and finance the funeral".

Kurt looked away from the officer when his silent tears completely blurred his vision. He buried his face in Finn's shoulder and quietly sobbed his heart out.

Blaine is dead. Blaine is _dead_. His Blaine, his loving husband, who always had something nice to say about everything, who loved his little family more than anything in the world, who were only 31 years old and who never got the chance to do half the things he dreamed of, is dead.

The next hour was a blur of paperwork and plans for the funeral. Kurt only nodded and signed papers when being asked to. He let Finn and Rachel (who came over the second she got the call from her husband) take care of the majority of the planning, such as date and color of the casket.

It was almost midnight when the officers left with polite handshakes and promises of encounters in the future ('Duh, the funeral is on Saturday') Kurt thought bitterly but he managed a polite nod.

He sat down on the couch again and put his face in his hands.

"Kurt. Do you need us to spend the night?" Rachel asked carefully.

Kurt just shrugged and sniffled. He didn't trust his voice enough right now to speak.

Rachel and Finn exchanged a glance. "Alright, I'll stay with you tonight. Finn will go home because he has to go to work early tomorrow. Is that ok?"

Kurt nodded before he stood up without looking at anyone and made his way up the stairs. He slowly stripped off his clothes and pulled out Blaine's old grey t-shirt that he used as a pajama. He pulled it over his head and closed his eyes as he breathed in the familiar scent of coffee and pinewood. He stood like that for a few moments, just breathing in and out with closed eyes before he broke. He collapsed on the floor in a heap of tears and cries of grief.

Eventually he fell asleep after a few hours of crying in Rachel's arms.

* * *

The next day, Kurt spent the entire day watching old homemade videos together with Daisy and Michael from when they were younger and videos of Kurt and Blaine from before Daisy and Michael were born.

When he told them of Blaine's death, they had cried and screamed for a while but after the first chock was over they had calmed down and just held on to Kurt as tight as they could with their tiny arms.

Kurt took a deep breath and swallowed down the lump in his throat when they watched the video from Kurt and Blaine's wedding. It had truly been one of the best days of his life. All their friends from New Directions and the Warblers were there to celebrate them and they even performed a few songs together. They had married each other in June six years after Kurt graduated from McKinley. They were young but they knew that they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together. They still felt that way; it only just came true for one of them.

Kurt and the kids had eaten ice cream for breakfast and lunch and ordered pizza for dinner. Kurt was determined to make his children's grieving process as painless as possible. Sure, spoiling them with sugar and fat perhaps wasn't the best way to do it, but their father had just passed away so he thought that some junk food couldn't hurt.

Kurt looked down at his two kids. The last thing that he would ever wish for anyone had just happened to his own children. They had lost a parent. His heart broke for the little girl and boy in his arms. The worst part was that they probably wouldn't even remember Blaine except for the way he looked on tape and in pictures. He only remembered small things about his mother and she passed away when he was eight. Michael and Daisy are only three and four. There is no way that they will remember the way his eyes lit up whenever they showed him one of their drawings, or the way his smile could light up a room, or the way that he loved them with everything he had.

Daisy looked up in Kurt's eyes with a small watery smile and Kurt stroked her dark brown hair gently. Daisy and Blaine really had the exact same kind of hair. Blaine had felt sorry for her when she was born and complained about her not getting her surrogate mother's straight hair, but Kurt loved it. He realized now that running his fingers through his daughter's hair almost had the same feeling to it as when he ran his fingers through his husband's hair, and he smiled softly to himself.

* * *

When Daisy and Michael finally fell asleep that night Kurt sat down by the kitchen counter with his cellphone clutched in his hand tightly. He took a deep breath and dialed the familiar number, pressed the phone to his ear and waited.

He was just about to hang up because this was really pathetic and cliché, but when the familiar melodic voice rang through the speaker he couldn't put the phone away.

"Hello, you've reached Blaine Hummel-Anderson's cellphone. I can't answer right now but leave your name and number after the tone and I'll come back to you as soon as possible. Bye!"

Blaine's smooth, cheery voice brought a new wave of tears in Kurt's eyes. He pushed the red button on the phone furiously and pressed it against his forehead while he cried silently.

After a minute he repeated the procedure and he cried harder and harder every time he heard Blaine say 'Bye'. He listened to the voicemail so many times that after a while he knew every rise and fall of Blaine's voice in the message.

The doorbell rang and Kurt frowned slightly when he put down the phone and made his way to the front door. He opened the door and squinted in the porch-light to see a smiling Sebastian standing outside the door.

"Hi Kurt. Um, I'm sorry if I woke you up. I was just returning the car, Blaine told me I could use it whenever I wanted to so.." he trailed off when he didn't get a response from Kurt. "Are you ok?"

Kurt just stared at Sebastian numbly. He didn't know. No one had told Sebastian yet.

Sebastian frowned and waved a hand in front of Kurt's face. "Kurt? Do you hear me? Listen, I get if you're mad at me for just taking the car and whatever but Blaine told me-"

"Blaine's dead"

Sebastian continued to frown and stared at Kurt silently.

"His plane crashed" Kurt whimpered and furiously wiped his eyes.

Sebastian stepped closer "What are you talking about?"

"He's dead Sebastian" Kurt said a little louder. "Come in, I can make you some coffee" he wiped his nose and started to turn around in the doorway.

Sebastian just looked at Kurt with a dumb expression on his face, like the words didn't make sense to him.

"What?" Kurt sniffled.

Sebastian frowned and looked at Kurt like he had grown two heads. "I don't want to fucking come in. I don't want coffee, I just… I just came over here to return Blaine's car and you're telling me… Why didn't you call me?" He asked furiously.

"I'm sorry Sebastian, but I've had my hands full all day trying to comfort my children, I thought that Finn told you"

"Well nobody called me!" He yelled.

Sebastian shook his head and turned around to leave.

"Sebastian, where are you going?" Kurt shouted after him.

Sebastian turned around with tears in his eyes "Why did you let him go over there Kurt?"

Kurt held on to the door so tight his knuckles whitened "Please don't"

"FOR WHAT GOOD NOW, HUH?" Sebastian yelled furiously before throwing the car keys on the wall next to the door and walking away.

Kurt stared after him and bit his lip to keep from shouting something back before picking up the keys and closing the door. He closed his eyes and sunk down to the floor with his back to the door.

* * *

Sebastian ended up going to the park where they took the kids on Sundays. He was furious. Why hadn't anyone though about calling him? Blaine was his best friend and no one had thought of even picking up their phone to tell him that his best friend died.

He closed his eyes and sat down on one of the swings.

Is he really such a screw-up as everyone seems to think he is? Sure, he had no real family, the only relationships he had lasted about twenty minutes and he drank way too much for a thirty year old. He had a good job as a lawyer which gave him more than enough money to pay the bills and then some. He had a nice apartment in town but that wasn't really a place where he felt at home. The things he enjoyed most in life were the things he did together with his best friend. And now he was gone.

It hit Sebastian like a gunshot in the stomach. Blaine was dead. His best friend was dead.

He gasped for air and felt hot tears run down his face. What was he supposed to do now?

* * *

After an hour of silently crying in the park Sebastian stood up and walked back to Kurt and Blaine's house. _'Huh, I guess it's just Kurt's house now'_ He thought to himself as he walked up the driveway.

He texted Kurt to come open the door since he didn't want to wake up Daisy and Michael. When he saw Kurt's red eyes and broken complexion he stepped forward and wrapped him up in a tight hug. They stood like that for what felt like hours. Just holding each other as tight as they could, understanding that they both had lost the person in their life that was most important to them and that they both needed this more than anything.


	4. Chapter 4

_Hey y'all! I will try to make daily updates but as you can see that's not working very well right now. Haha. But at least one every other day. I'm not making any promises but I will try._

_It has come to my attention that this fic is somewhat similar to another Kurtbastian fic out there. I wasn't aware of the similarities and I hadn't read the other fic before I started on this one so I can honestly say that I was not stealing the idea from anywhere. It came to me when I watched the movie Brothers. I have now read that other story and I'm not so concerned anymore since this story are going to play out very differently in the end. Yep, that's all!_

_Disclaimer: I don't own Glee, the characters associated to Glee, or the scenes that I borrowed from the movie Brothers._

* * *

Chapter four.

The funeral was the Sunday after the news had been delivered. Kurt stood in his bedroom, smoothing out his black dress pants and jacket and took a deep breath. Today was the day that he would say goodbye to his husband.

They had never found any bodies after the crash so it was an empty casket that would be standing in front of the grieving people in church today. That only made it worse for Kurt. To not be able to say goodbye properly. To be having to say goodbye to an empty wooden box instead of his Blaine.

He had chosen to have the funeral in church simply because there was no other place in Lima that was appropriate for a funeral. He had asked the minister to not say any prayers or to sing any Christian songs just because he knew that Blaine would find it silly that people would be praying to something at his funeral that he didn't believe in. After the ceremony they would go to Burt and Carole's house for coffee and a bite to eat and to catch up with old friends.

Kurt wiped his eyes on a tissue, looked himself over in the mirror and took a deep breath. He could do this, he could be strong. And he wouldn't cry in front of his children.

He made his way upstairs to Michael and Daisy's bedrooms. He knocked on Daisy's door but when no one answered he walked in uninvited. "Are you ready to go, Daisy?" He asked as he opened the door. Daisy was sitting on the edge of the bed in her pajamas with a pout and her black dress thrown across the room.

"Honey, why aren't you in your dress?"

"I don't want to put it on. It's a stupid dress"

Kurt frowned and picked up the dress "But baby you have to put it on so that we can go to church. We'll be late if we don't leave soon"

Daisy looked away with stubborn tear-filled eyes and her arms crossed over her chest.

Kurt sighed, sat down next to his daughter and wrapped her up in his arms. He rocked her back and forth and whispered "It would really mean a lot to both me and Daddie if you put on the dress and came with me to church." He looked into her big hazel eyes. "Could you do that for me?"

She was silent for a minute before she nodded and took the dress from Kurt's hands. Kurt kissed her forehead and smiled "Thank you".

Michael walked in a bit stiffly in his little suit jacket and black jeans. He stopped when he saw Kurt and Daisy on the bed. "Is dad really dead like your mom?"

Kurt swallowed and nodded "Yes"

Michael was silent for a moment as he studied Kurt's face. "Okay"

* * *

Kurt greeted the guests outside the church with stiff smiles and polite handshakes. He almost broke down when a soldier came up and said "Your husband was the best damned marine I've ever had the pleasure of working with". Kurt had to force down the tears and nodded his thanks before turning to the next person in line to go in to the church.

When the greetings were over he sat down in the front row next to Sebastian who had taken care of entertaining Daisy and Michael while Kurt was busy. Kurt smiled gratefully at Sebastian as he sat down and looked around the church at all the guests.

All of their friends and family members were there. Everyone except for Delilah and Mark Anderson. Blaine's parents had never been accepting of their lifestyle and when Kurt and Blaine announced their engagement they had ended all contact with their son. Kurt shook his head and sighed. They couldn't even come to their own son's funeral. Fucking typical.

He waved at Cooper who sat a few rows behind Kurt with his blonde wife. Kurt appreciated that he had taken the time to fly over from Los Angeles and his big movie shoot to be here. Cooper hadn't been around much since Blaine was a little kid, but he always called at least once a week and Kurt and Blaine even went to a LA a few times to visit Cooper and his family.

He glanced over his left shoulder and saw Mercedes and Sam sitting close together with their six year old daughter. Santana and her red haired girlfriend sat behind them together with Quinn and Puck. They all gave him sympathetic smiles and small waves. Kurt sighed and turned around so that he was facing the casket again. He would talk to their friends later, now all he wanted to focus on was getting through the ceremony while comforting his children and trying not to break down.

It was a beautiful small church in the outskirts of Lima. The wall behind the casket was one big window with a breathtaking view of fields of yellow grass, naked trees, some cows that were peacefully enjoying the December sun and a railroad that went through it all.

Kurt smiled a little to himself when he saw a train pass by. It looked like a painting. The peaceful and quiet landscape with the loud metallic train that cut through it all. It was an old train and when Kurt thought about it the train almost looked like the Hogwarts express. He chuckled quietly to himself. Blaine would have loved to see it. He would probably lift up Daisy and Michael in his arms and point towards the train and make up some story about where it was headed to and who were on the train.

It felt like a sign. Like that train symbolized Blaine and his death. Kurt certainly wasn't happy that he was gone and he knew that he would always have an aching hole inside him, but he would try to stay strong. He had to.

Kurt glanced to his right where Daisy were quietly teaching Sebastian and Michael a new song that her friend Gabrielle had taught her last week when she played at her house.

It would be hard, but they would manage it together.

* * *

The ceremony was beautiful. Yes, most people cried and Kurt had a hard time looking at the picture that were standing over the casket, but Kurt still found it beautiful and honoring of his husband's memory.

Kurt almost broke down when Tina and Mike (who had flown all the way from London, where Mike is hired as a dancer in the West End production of Billy Elliot and Tina is a teacher) had stood up and sung Blackbird to Kurt and Blaine. It was a total surprise to Kurt and he had to look down to hide the tears in his eyes.

He looked up at Sebastian when he felt the tall man put his hand on top of Kurt's. Sebastian was looking at the casket with dull eyes and a clenched jaw. Kurt turned his hand around and squeezed Sebastian's to show him that he was not alone. Sebastian met his eyes and gave one silent, sad nod before he looked back to the empty casket.

* * *

The ride to Burt's and Carole's house was silent. Sebastian drove with Kurt in the passenger seat and Michael and Daisy in the back.

When their closest friends and some of Blaine's co-workers had arrived, the same officer who delivered the news of Blaine's death walked up to where Kurt was sitting on the sofa.

"I'm sorry for your loss, Kurt"

Kurt looked up and nodded "Thank you"

The officer took a deep breath and pulled out something from the inner pocket of his jacket. He extended his hand to Kurt. "Blaine left this for you. He never wanted me to have to give it to you".

In his hand was a letter. Kurt blinked a couple of times before he took the letter. On top of it was Blaine's unmistakable handwriting 'to Kurt'.

As Kurt traced the letters with his finger he felt a fresh wave of tears hit him. He bit his bottom lip and covered his eyes with his hands. Michael and Daisy was out in the backyard so he didn't have to worry about them seeing him cry.

The officer (Kurt didn't even know his name. He'd played such a big part of Kurt's life lately and he didn't even know his name) put his hand on Kurt's shoulder and sighed. "Hang in there". And then he left.

* * *

Burt walked out of the kitchen (Carole had banned him from there ever since he accidentally knocked over her favorite bowl) and looked around the living room. Mike and Tina were chatting with Puck and Quinn. Quinn was three months pregnant so it didn't show yet, but she did have that pregnant glow. Santana had her arm wrapped around her girlfriend's (he had learned her name was Olivia) waist and was leaning against the fireplace talking to Finn and Rachel.

Brittany and Santana had broken up a couple of years after college. Brittany got a teaching job at a dance studio in California and Santana had just got a record deal in New York so they decided to split up. Brittany wasn't attending the funeral since she was busy working as a choreographer for a new movie.

Artie sat by the window together with Mercedes, Sam, and Joe. They had all stayed in touch after leaving McKinley, everyone except for Rory and Sugar who moved to Ireland and got married. They had been invited to the wedding but since the plane ride to Ireland was pretty expensive, not everyone was able to go. This made Sugar very upset and they hadn't heard from her or Rory since then.

Burt said hello to the old glee kids as well as some relatives, co-workers and friends from the Warblers before he headed out to the backyard. He smiled and waved to Daisy and Michael who played in the little sandbox that Burt had built when he found out that he was expecting grandkids.

Sebastian sat by the trees across the backyard from the sandbox and pulled out yellow grass from the ground. It was cold outside but it surprisingly hadn't come any snow yet. It was only early December so that might not be so surprising, but the snow usually arrived around this time of the year.

Burt sighed and sat down next to Sebastian. "Are you ok, kiddo?"

Sebastian glanced to his side to avoid eye contact and cleared his throat "Yeah sure."

Burt raised an eyebrow "You're not fooling anyone with the 'I'm fine' act you know. I know that everyone's sad but you seem to be the one to take it the hardest. Well, except for Kurt."

Sebastian frowned down at his lap and shook his head disbelievingly. "I just don't get it" he whispered.

"Don't get what?"

Sebastian sighed and began to speak. "I know that this sounds all mushy and cliché and whatnot but it should have been me. I should have been the one to die out there. I'm a bad person. Blaine is the best person in this whole fucking miserable world. He helps people, he _loves_ people... What do I do? I fuck around, I spend too much money on shit and I have only really cared for a handful of people in my life. What the fuck does that say about me and about who I am?" he shook his head with tear-filled eyes. "It should have been me"

Sebastian didn't know why he told Burt this but the look in Burt's eyes told him that he wasn't going to judge him.

Burt nodded "I understand what you mean. I don't agree that it should have been you, because that is bullshit. I'm sorry but it's true. Blaine was a wonderful person, but no one deserves what happened to him."

Sebastian just frowned to himself. "Yeah" he mumbled.

Burt patted him on his knee. "Now, I'm going to go see if Kurt needs me." He stood up and brushed off his pants. "If I were you, I would take Michael and Daisy inside, because it's freezing out here, I would get myself a plate of food and I would stop thinking such foolish thoughts." He smiled slightly. "But that's just me".

Sebastian watched him walk away and then shook his head with a sigh before shouting across the backyard. "Daisy, Michael, want to go inside and get some food?"

"Ok Uncle Sebby!"

He smiled before standing up. "Come on, I bet Carole made something really delicious"

* * *

That night when Kurt lay in bed he pulled out the envelope. He traced the letters with his fingers again and studied it hard. After several minutes of just staring at the letter he put it in his bedside drawer and squeezed his eyes shut. He wasn't ready.


	5. Chapter 5

_I love that I'm publishing these chapters so fast! Two chapters within 24 hours PLUS I'm working on chapter six. _

_This story is a bit jumpy, I know. No one has commented on that but I just thought I'd put it out there as a sort of warning. It's probably gonna be a slight time jump between every chapter, but that's just so that I can continue with the story and not make it a snore-bore._

_Disclaimer: I do not own Glee, any character associated to glee or the scenes that I've borrowed from the movie Brothers._

* * *

Chapter five.

One week later Kurt was ironing in the middle of the night in his living room. He had had a busy day and only now had time to finish his chores around the house.

The phone rang and he quickly scrambled to pick up so that it wouldn't wake up the kids.

"Hello?"

"Kurt?"

Kurt frowned "…Sebastian?"

Sebastian mumbled a little with a small giggle "I... I know it's like one in the morning-"

"It's three in the morning" Kurt cuts in with an eye roll.

"Right, um… I've have a couple of drinks"

There is a voice in the background that shouts out "You've had a hell of a lot more than a couple of drinks."

Sebastian snorts "Whatever... Well apparently they're the most fucking expensive drinks in the world and um, I didn't bring enough cash so now I owe like 47 dollars."

Kurt sighed but didn't say anything so Sebastian continued.

"I was planning on just walking out but this guy says he's gonna call the police and that don't sound like fun so…"

Kurt shook his head and glanced over at the clock. "Which bar?"

"Scandals."

Kurt rolled his eyes again "Of course. I'll be there soon."

* * *

Kurt walks into the bar ten minutes later and immediately spots Sebastian by the bar, talking to an old man who looks pretty pissed.

Kurt walks up to them "Hey, how much does he owe you?" he asks the man in the bar.

"47 dollars and two broken glasses." The man answers and throws a dirty look at Sebastian.

Sebastian just sits there and watches them with a goofy smile.

Kurt pulls out his wallet "How about we say 50?"

"That's fine, just get him out of here" he points at Sebastian who is now closely inspecting a napkin with great interest.

Kurt sighs and nods "Come on Sebastian, let's go."

Sebastian shakes his head and whines "But it's so much fun here. I don't wanna leave yet."

Kurt grabs Sebastian's jaw so that he is forced to look at Kurt "I have two little children sleeping in my car in a parking lot at three in the morning." He raises his voice dangerously. "You think you're funny?"

He then stomps off. Sebastian looks at the barman who just raises his eyebrows. Sebastian rolls his eyes and walks out to the car.

* * *

When they arrive at Kurt's house Kurt immediately jumps out of the car and hurries to the front door to open it. Sebastian steps out of the car a little slower and opens the back door. He lifts out a sleeping Daisy and carries her to the door.

He groans and sighs when he passes Kurt who's on his way to collect Michael. "My head is spinning, I don't think I should be carrying a child." The tall man whines.

Kurt rolls his eyes "Just put her in her bed, ok?"

Sebastian walks up the stairs with a mumbled "Ok…"

* * *

Sebastian ended up passes out on the couch and he groaned as was waking up to a banging noise. Well, not a banging noise, but a whisking noise that definitely_ sounds_ like a banging noise in Sebastian's hung over head.

He squints and looks to his left. Michael is standing there with a huge smile on his face while he whisks something that looks suspiciously like pancake batter in a bowl. "Uncle Sebby? Are you awake Uncle Sebby?" He whispers rather loudly.

"No…" Sebastian groans.

"Yes you are" Michael giggles and whisks even harder.

Sebastian groans and buries his face in a couch-pillow. "Could you stop that please?"

"I'm making pancakes for Papa" Michael answers with a huge grin that's missing one front tooth. "I can't stop, my sister told me to do this."

Sebastian frowns and peeks out again "Do you even know how to make pancakes?"

"No, but I think this is the same color as when Papa makes them…" Michael looks down in the bowl and nods.

Sebastian snorts and reluctantly stands up "Ok you're not allowed to use the stove, I'll make the pancakes."

Michael keeps whisking with a little pout "But I want to make them."

"You can help as much as you want but Michael, you're three years old, you're not gonna be able to use the stove"

Michael sighs but keeps whisking "Ok." He then looks at Sebastian suspiciously. "Why are you here? This is not your house."

Sebastian nods and takes the bowl from Michael "You're right, but I had a sleepover here last night."

Michael keeps looking suspicious but nods.

Sebastian snorts and ruffles Michael's brown hair "Alright, let's go help your sister."

Daisy stands in the kitchen and tries to reach up to turn the stove on. Sebastian quickly scoops up her in his arms to keep her from getting hurt. "Whoa there little girl, let's leave the grown up cooking for Uncle Sebastian, shall we?"

He puts her down and opens the fridge to pull out ingredients for pancakes.

"But we wanna make pancakes for Papa. He's sad."

Michael nods "Our Daddie is dead."

Daisy turns to Michael and frowns "He knows that already."

She then turns to Sebastian and gasps. "Don't drink the milk out of the carton, its gross!" She exclaims.

Sebastian rolls his eyes "Shut up, you're gross."

Daisy put her hands on her hips and raises an eyebrow "No I'm not, I'm fabulous."

Sebastian chuckles and picks her up before setting her down on the kitchen counter next to Michael. He gives them the ingredients and tells them how to make a proper pancake batter. He watches them do it before turning on the stove. After a while, they had made pancakes out of almost the whole batter.

Kurt walked down the stairs from his bedroom with tired eyes, clad in his pajama pants and a blue t-shirt. He gave up trying to be fashionable in the mornings when Daisy was born. He turned the corner to the kitchen and smiled. "What's going on here?"

Daisy turned around and sighed "Papa, what are you doing here? You're supposed to be upstairs, it's supposed to be a surprise!"

"I_ am_ surprised!" He chuckled. "Thank you" he pulled Daisy and Michael in for a big hug.

There was a knock on the door and Daisy and Michael hurried to see who it was. They opened the door and exclaimed "Grandpa!"

Burt walked in and smiled warmly to his grandkids. "What are you two wild kids up to?"

Michael giggled "We're making pancakes for Papa."

"You are? Aren't you a little young to make pancakes on your own?" he raised an eyebrow.

Daisy rolled her eyes "Yes, but Uncle Sebby helped us with the hard stuff."

"Oh, Uncle Sebby's here too, huh?" He said when they walked in to the kitchen again.

Sebastian smiled and rubbed his hands through his sleep-toloused hair. "Yeah, here I am."

Burt chuckled and eyed the scene in front of him. Sebastian was standing next to the stove, looking like death. Kurt stood next to the kitchen counter, cutting fruits to go with the pancakes with heavy bags under his eyes.

"So, what have you kids been up to lately?" he asked Kurt and Sebastian.

They shared a glance before Kurt cleared his throat "Um, not much. Been busy with work and the kids."

Sebastian nodded "Yeah, I've been busy with work too." He bit his lip. The truth was he hadn't been to work since Blaine's funeral. He had spent every night at Scandals. He hadn't done his usual fuck-and-leave routine, he had just sat at the bar trying to drink the pain away. His boss accepted this week as a part of his mourning-process since he knew how close Sebastian and Blaine was, but he warned that if Sebastian took anymore time off he would cut down on Sebastian's vacation-days.

Burt nodded and didn't ask any more questions.

They all ate the pancakes together. Michael and Daisy had goofy smiles on their faces during the whole meal and proudly pronounced that they were the one to make the pancakes all by themselves between every bite. Sebastian rolled his eyes but didn't say anything.

When they had cleaned up the mess and Sebastian decided that it was time for him to leave, he pulled Kurt to the side. "Listen, I'm sorry for last night. I didn't know what to do and I left my credit cards at home."

Kurt sighed "It's fine. Just don't do it again. I don't want Daisy and Michael to have to see you drunk. Luckily they were asleep and probably don't remember half of it but it's just something that I'm not comfortable with them seeing."

Sebastian nodded "Yeah, totally." He turned around and walked to the door. "See you tomorrow, right? It's Sunday after all."

"Yeah, see you tomorrow." Kurt smiled.

* * *

When the door closed Kurt turned around to see his dad watch him from the kitchen. Kurt put a hand on his chest and breathed out "You almost gave me a heart attack there, dad."

Burt studied his face and just raised an eyebrow.

Kurt frowned and walked past his father into the kitchen. "What?"

Burt turned around with a sigh. "Kurt, I know it's hard. And I know it's only been a week since the funeral but you have to start living."

Kurt gripped the edge of the kitchen counter and closed his eyes. "I can't."

"Yes you can son. You are a Hummel and we Hummel's are strong. It took me a long while to get over your mom and I apologize for that, because that hurt you." He sighed. "I'd cut my throat to bring him back to you Kurt, but I can't do that. Don't you see how miserable this is making Michael and Daisy?"

Kurt turned around to face his father with angry tears in his eyes. "So, you're telling me I'm a bad father?"

Burt shook his head "That's not at all what I'm saying. You're an amazing father and so was Blaine, but you have to at least pretend to be ok when you're around the kids. You can come to me or Carole or Finn or whoever to cry and let the pain out, but don't bring down your kids."

Kurt looked out the window and nodded.

"Alright? You gonna be ok today?" Burt asked.

Kurt smiled a small smile and nodded once again "Yeah, I'm gonna be fine. Thank you dad."

Burt wrapped up his son in a tight hug "Anytime kiddo. Now I have to go home and pretend I didn't just eat a bunch of pancakes."

Kurt groaned and rolled his eyes "Dad, think about your heart."

Burt chuckled "I'm kidding Kurt."

They hugged again and then Burt left.

Kurt finished cleaning the kitchen before he walked in to the living room where Daisy and Michael were watching the Little Mermaid. He smiled and plopped down on the sofa next to them.

"What do you guys wanna do today?"

* * *

**R&R**


	6. Chapter 6

_I am in love with all of you guys who read and review! _

_As always, I do not own Glee, any characters associated to Glee or the scenes that I've borrowed from the movie Brothers. I if did, I would be a rich bitch._

_(Also, my heart goes out to the victims and the families and friends of the victims in Aurora.. it's just heartbreaking)_

* * *

Chapter six.

The next Monday, Kurt arrived home from work to see three cars outside his house. He frowned suspiciously as he parked his car on the street next to his house. He stepped out of his car and walked past the cars to the front door. Inside he was met with loud voices.

Kurt walked into the kitchen with a frown on his face. "What's going on here?"

The four men in the kitchen immediately stopped and turned around. Kurt smiled when he saw the sheepish looks on Sebastian, Wes, David and Trent's faces.

"Kurt! You're home" Sebastian smiled and stepped forward.

Kurt raised an eyebrow and glanced around the kitchen with a look that screamed 'explain'.

Sebastian cleared his throat slightly "Um, you remember Wes, Trent and David right?"

Kurt snorted and rolled his eyes "Of course I do, why would I forget them?" he asked before smiling at the three boys in the background. He received waves and a chorus of 'hi Kurt!'.

Sebastian rubbed his hand on the back of his neck "Um, we're just fixing up the kitchen for you. Burt mentioned that you wanted to paint the walls and since I have nothing better to do after work I decided to call these idiots and ask for help."

Wes nodded "We're gonna do the same to Nick since he's so busy with the baby. Like a nice surprise".

Kurt smiled sadly. Jeff had been in the same plane as Blaine and because of that he was also reported as dead. They had held his funeral a couple of days after Blaine's and Nick, who was married to Jeff, had come over to Kurt's house a couple of times for comfort. Jeff and Nick had just adopted a little baby girl right before Jeff's departure so Nick had his hands full with little Rose.

"Well that's very kind of you, but I hope you ask Nick before you just take over his home. Some people don't take well on finding four men in their kitchen when they come home from work." he gave a stern look to Sebastian who just shrugged with a small smile on his face.

"Sorry Kurt" Trent said sheepishly.

"It's ok. Just make it look fabulous" he smirked.

"Oh, it's gonna look fabulous alright" Trent winked and got back to pouring paint in a bucket. Sebastian and David continued picking away paintings and pictures from the walls and Wes put paper on the floor.

"Do you guys want something? Coffee, tea?" Kurt asked.

"No thank you, we're fine" David answered politely.

Kurt nodded. "Well, I'm just gonna… go upstairs until it's time to pick up Daisy and Michael from kindergarten" he said before he walked up the stairs.

David hit Sebastian on his arm when Kurt was gone. "Dude, I thought he knew we were going to be here today?"

Sebastian just shrugged "What's the big deal? It was supposed to be a surprise. I kind of put him in a rough spot a couple of nights ago and I wanted to make it up to him."

Trent raised an eyebrow "That's awfully nice of you."

"Why so surprised? I'm not a monster" Sebastian rolled his eyes.

Trent just snorted and turned back to the paint.

..

The following Saturday, Kurt was lying in his bed staring at the ceiling when there was a knock on his bedroom door. Carole peeked her head in "Michael and Daisy is back." She smiled. "The boys are downstairs as well working in the kitchen."

The kids had spent the night at Burt and Carole's house since Kurt had had a particularly rough time and needed a couple of hours by himself to just lie in bed and cry.

Kurt smiled weakly and thanked Carole before slowly getting out of bed. Carole smiled too and walked downstairs when Kurt started changing out of his pajamas.

Kurt walked downstairs a couple of minutes later and stopped in the doorway to the kitchen.

Sebastian was sitting on the kitchen counter, helping Michael hold a paintbrush. "Who's painting the kitchen now?" Sebastian chuckled.

Michael beamed up at him and giggled "I am, Uncle Sebby!" He continued to paint the wall as high as he could reach in the blue-grey color that Sebastian had picked out and that Kurt had approved of.

David was standing on the other side of the kitchen with Daisy on his shoulder, letting her paint the higher parts on the wall. Trent was leaning against the kitchen island and Wes sat on the floor, mixing colors. They all had a pleasant conversation going on.

"You know, your daddy was a really good polo player" David said to Daisy. "He was small but he was really good. Wes and I used to go to the games in high school just to see him play."

"Really?" Daisy said.

"Yeah" David nodded.

Kurt chuckled. "Daisy, you're so tall" he exclaimed jokily.

She turned her little head to look at him and beamed "Thanks Papa"

Kurt smiled at her before walking over to Sebastian and Michael "Good job Michael, it's gonna look so pretty when you're done."

"Thanks Papa" Michael said proudly.

Sebastian looked at Kurt and chuckled. He stared at him for a moment, slightly sobering up his expression. "Do they have homework or something they need to do?" he asked.

Kurt raised an eyebrow and shook his head with an amused smile "They're in kindergarten, Bas. They don't have homework yet."

Sebastian shook his head at his own foolishness "Right, of course." He then turned back to Michael who had run out of color on his brush. "Go dip it in the bucket over there" he pointed to the bucket that stood on the edge of the counter.

Michael nodded and walked over. He dipped his brush a little too hard which made the bucket fall down right into Wes's lap.

"Shit!" Wes exclaimed and scrambled off the ground to try to escape the color.

Daisy gasped "Papa he cursed!"

"I know honey, and that was bad" Kurt agreed.

Wes looked down at himself and cursed silently again. He had blue-grey color all over his pants and the bottom of his shirt. "These are brand new pants" he muttered.

Michael walked over to stand behind Sebastian on the counter and hugged his shoulder. "I'm sorry" he said to Wes.

Wes bit his lip to keep from cursing again and Kurt stepped up and put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "Wait here, I think I have something that you can change into." Wes nodded and stood in the middle of the room with his arms stretched out at his sides as Kurt walked out of the room.

David looked at him with sympathetic eyes "it's not that bad, man"

Sebastian bit back a smile and nodded "Yeah, there's like almost nothing on you."

"It looks fine, that will totally go away." David smiled.

Trent snorted "Oh hell no, that's not going away."

They all started laughing hysterically at that and Wes rolled his eyes. He raised an eyebrow and opened up his arms "Alright, if it's not that bad then let's hug it out."

The three men all stopped laughing. "W-what?" Trent asked.

Wes beamed at them all "Hugs? Nobody want a hug?" He walked towards Sebastian with open arms but Sebastian jumped off the counter and scooped Michael up in his arms.

"Stay away from the kid" He warned as he held a giggling Michael in front of him.

Wes turned around and started walking towards David and Daisy who screamed.

..

Kurt sighed as he opened Blaine's closet for the first time in three months. He immediately was hit by the familiar scent of coffee and pinewood. He stood there for a moment, just looking at the different shirts and pants, breathing in and breathing out.

After a minute he swallowed down the lump in his throat and stepped forward. He looked at a few shirts that he thought would fit Wes and took them off their hangers. When he was about to turn around and close the closet doors he looked over the rest of Blaine's clothes. It hurt too much to see them hanging there. To have them in his house at all.

He bit his lip and swallowed furiously as he started pulling more shirts off their hangers. He heard a button pop but he didn't care, he just had to get rid of them. When he had collected all of Blaine's casual shirts and most of his jeans he stood in front of the closet and breathed deeply. He wiped away a tear that had rolled down his cheek before he closed the doors and walked downstairs.

He walked up to Wes who had pulled off his shirt and pants and was now standing in the middle of the kitchen in only a white t-shirt and boxers. Kurt handed him the large pile of clothes. "These should all fit you."

"Thank you Kurt, but all I need is just a shirt and some pants."

Kurt shook his head "Take it all."

Wes looked uncertain "But I don't need it all."

Kurt took a deep breath, looked at Sebastian who was watching him with intense green eyes and turned around. He wiped his eyes as he walked in to the living room.

Wes looked around the kitchen at the other men "He really didn't have to give me all this."

Sebastian glared at him "Just take it all."

Wes frowned "Should I put it back?"

"Jeez Wes, just take the fucking clothes" Trent whispered angrily.

"Alright, alright, I was just asking" Wes whispered back.

..

A half-hour later as the guys were leaving, Sebastian sat down next to Kurt on the sofa.

"Call me later about Daisy's birthday, ok?"

Kurt looked up into his green eyes and nodded with a tight smile.

Sebastian bit his lip a little uncertainly. "And if you want to talk or whatever… just call me."

He put a hand on Kurt's knee and stood up before walking out the front door to David's waiting car.

* * *

**R&R**


	7. Chapter 7

_I've been so lazy and distracted so this update is super late... sorry. Btw, I've seen that I've had a few Swedish readers. Yeeeeah! Holler if you're a Swede! _

_And I sort of don't like this chapter at all... haha. I'll try to have something better tomorrow or Wednesday. _

_Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or any characters associated to Glee._

* * *

Chapter Seven.

Daisy's fifth birthday was on December 14th. Kurt had invited a few close friends to the family over for a little party in their house. Daisy's friends from kindergarten had already celebrated her with cake in kindergarten the day before.

It was too cold and snowy out for them to be outside in the backyard so Kurt had decorated the kitchen and living room with balloons and colorful stripes.

Burt, Carole, Finn and Rachel were the first ones to arrive. They sat in the living room playing with Michael and Daisy while Kurt were arranging cupcakes and decorating the cake in the kitchen. He looked up when he heard a small gasp.

"Papa, Auntie Rachel said she's gonna teach me how to sing all pretty like you and her!" Daisy exclaimed happily.

Kurt looked at Rachel with a fond smile. She just shrugged with a smile "It's gonna be fun. I've heard her sing a little and if my ears don't fool me I think we have a young Barbra Streisand in the making here." She nudged Daisy's shoulder and Daisy just sat there with a smile that shone brighter than the sun.

Kurt rolled his eyes with a smile "I would prefer it if she became the new Patti Lupone, that way she won't constantly be compared to you."

Rachel fake-pouted and leaned down to stage-whisper in Daisy's ear "I will make a mini Barbra out of you, and that's final."

Daisy giggled and nodded even though she was a bit confused as to who this Barbra lady was.

Kurt chuckled and turned back to the cake when there was a knock on the door.

"I'll get it, I'll get it!" Daisy shouted as she sprinted towards the front door. Kurt smiled fondly as he wiped his hands on a towel and followed his daughter to the hallway.

Sebastian smiled hugely as Daisy opened the door. He immediately scooped her up in his arms and started attacking her with kisses all over her face. She giggled and squirmed and tried to bat him away. "Eww Uncle Sebby, you're giving me boy-cooties!"

"Oh shut up little munchkin, you should be happy I am the one kissing your pretty face and not some disgusting little brat from school" he said and planted a final kiss on Daisy's forehead.

Kurt bit his lip to keep from bursting out laughing when his daughter put her hand on her hip and glared at Sebastian. "That happened one time in kindergarten. Stephen said he liked my dress and then he kissed my cheek".

Sebastian formed his face into a serious expression "I hope you put him in his place."

"Of course I did, no boys get to kiss me" Daisy rolled her eyes like it was obvious.

"Good girl" Sebastian smirked.

Kurt cleared his throat to get their attention. "Alright Daisy, go in to the living room and tell the others that Sebastian's here" he smiled.

Daisy ran in to the living room and Sebastian raised an eyebrow. "What's your agenda Mr. Hummel-Anderson?" He smirked.

Kurt rolled his eyes "No agenda Mr. Smythe, although I need help in the kitchen and everyone in there-", he gestured towards the living room, "-is useless. Well, not Carole but she's busy keeping dad from the cookies."

"Ah, so you're only using me for my amazing cooking skills?"

"That is correct" Kurt laughed and led the way into the kitchen. "Now, how handy are you with a spritzer?"

Sebastian snorted "That doesn't seem so hard" he said and took the spritzer from Kurt. "Is it the cupcakes you need help with?"

"Yes, you just need to spritz something pretty on the frosting. Like a heart or a star or something"

"Yes sir." Sebastian said as he walked over to the cupcakes.

Kurt turned back to the big cake with a smile. Although after a minute he turned back to Sebastian when he heard the tall man curse softly under his breath. "Need help?"

Sebastian sighed "My hearts looks like fucking misshaped circles. This shit is _hard_."

Kurt rolled his eyes again (he tends to do so a lot whenever Sebastian is around). "Move over, I'll show you".

Sebastian moved to the side a little to let Kurt stand in front of the cupcakes. He handed him the spritzer and watched his movements closely. "Fucking typical. Your hearts actually _looks_ like hearts" He sighed.

Kurt laughed "It's really not that hard. Come here" He grabbed Sebastian's hand and placed it over the spritzer. He then laid his own hand on top of Sebastian's and moved them together to create shapes.

Kurt smiled when they had made a couple of hearts together "There you go. As I said; not that hard." He turned his head and his smile faltered when he saw how close they were. Sebastian's smoldering green eyes were staring straight into Kurt's blue-grey ones.

Kurt was frozen into his place next to the kitchen counter. He felt Sebastian's breath on his cheek and he swallowed thickly as he slowly started to lean forward.

"Hey Kurt, when is the o-oh… Sorry". Finn blushed as he stood in the doorway to the kitchen. Kurt jumped slightly and quickly looked away from Sebastian.

He cleared his throat awkwardly "Uhm, thanks for the help Sebastian. I think I can manage the rest" he told the kitchen counter.

Sebastian nodded and grabbed his bag from the hallway before he hurried past the awkward-looking Finn into the living room.

Kurt sighed and turned back around to finish the rest of the cupcakes. After a minute of feeling Finn's eyes in his neck he turned around "Did you want something?"

"Uh, yeah… right. Rachel was wondering when the others are coming?" Finn scratched his neck.

"They should be here any minute"

Finn nodded and as if on a cue there was a knock on the door.

* * *

The rest of the party went by pretty smoothly. Kurt and Sebastian avoided eye contact the entire time and although that caused them to receive some strange looks from Burt, it made the situation a little less awkward.

Neither of them knew what just happened. Some sort of connection had caused the almost-kiss and Kurt felt extremely grateful for Finn because he arrived at the exact right time. Kurt swallowed down the guilt that threatened to rise in his throat and smiled when Daisy showed him her new doll for the fifth time.

Nick and little Rose had arrived shortly after Kurt finished the cupcakes and not long after that Sam and Mercedes arrived too.

Daisy had opened enough presents to please a small village. Kurt cringed slightly when he saw all the toys but he was desperate for his children to be happy again. Apparently Burt and Finn were thinking the same thing since they both had bought at least four presents each. Even Michael got a few presents. It didn't make sense but they were happy so who were Kurt to say no?

After a few hours Nick had to go home so Rose could have her nap and Mercedes and Sam had to go to Sam's parents' house to get their daughter. They said goodbye and hugged everyone before they left. When Kurt returned from the hallway it was to a children-free living room.

"Where did Daisy and Michael go?" Kurt asked Carole.

"Oh, Daisy wanted to show Sebastian her new dollhouse so they went upstairs." Carole smiled softly.

Kurt nodded and sat down on the couch with a sigh. "I can't believe all these presents. They are so spoiled" He chuckled.

Burt smiled "But she liked them."

"Yeah she did" Kurt nodded.

They didn't say anything for a minute, just enjoying the silence that was rare whenever Daisy were around. After a minute Finn spoke up.

"What's going on with you and Sebastian?"

Kurt froze. He looked around the room and saw that everyone was watching him with curious expressions. He frowned "Nothing, why would you say that?"

Finn shrugged and sunk deeper down in the chair he was sitting on next to the sofa. "It didn't look like nothing when I walked in on you two in the kitchen."

Rachel gasped "Walked in on what?" She asked with big eyes.

Kurt glared at them both. "As I said, nothing is going on. I was just helping him with the cupcakes. Some of you are apparently not as good as me when it comes to baking" he shrugged his shoulders and looked down at his hands.

He didn't look up to see their faces but he heard hums of agreement and no one spoke any further of the subject. Kurt was grateful of that because he didn't know if he could stand the humiliation. Nothing had happened but if Finn hadn't walked in, he was pretty sure that they might have kissed.

Kurt swallowed. No, they wouldn't have kissed, that's silly. He was still very much mourning Blaine's death and was nowhere near ready to move on.

He nodded to himself with finality and tuned back in to Rachel's rant about some of her co-workers.


	8. Chapter 8

_I understand if you want to disown me by now. I lied to you. I told you that I would update at least a few times a week and look at me now: the first chapter in over a month. I apologize. I lost my inspiration and felt really bad about the last chapter so I just put it on hold for a month. I hope it will not happen again._

_Disclaimer: I do not own Glee, any character associated to Glee or the scenes that I've borrowed from the movie Brothers._

_This is the very first fluffy chapter of this story. So.. Enjoy!_

* * *

Chapter 8.

It had been a week since Daisy's birthday party. It had been a week and Sebastian was pretty sure that Kurt was avoiding him.

It had started the day after the party. Sebastian had called Kurt to see if the kids and he wanted to come with him to the park. Kurt had had a distant tone in his voice and told him that the kids would be happy to come but that they had to go without him. His excuse was that he had a lot of important paperwork or something like that.

At the time it was fine, Sebastian understood that he was busy. It wasn't like he came with them to the park all the time anyways.

But when it had been a week and they only had seen each other face to face twice, he was becoming suspicious. Why was Kurt avoiding him? Was it because he finally realized that Sebastian was nothing but trouble and wanted nothing to do with him? No that can't be it, he still let him spend time with Daisy and Michael. Sebastian had thought it over a few times and come to the conclusion that it had to do with the incident in the kitchen on Daisy's birthday.

They had almost kissed. Sebastian didn't even know why. He had just felt this strange pull towards the other man which he was sure that Kurt had felt too. It takes two to tango after all.

Sebastian sighed as he dialed Kurt's number once again. He waited four signals before Kurt picked up.

"Hello?"

"Hi Kurt, its Sebastian."

"Oh, hi."

Sebastian frowned at the short answer but shrugged it off and continued.

"I called to ask you if you and the kids are doing anything special today?"

There was silence for a moment before Kurt answered reluctantly. "…Uhm. Not really.."

That's it. Sebastian could take being ignored by the other man but he could not take that tone. It sounded like Kurt was actually dreading the possibility of Sebastian wanting to spend time with them.

"Alright Kurt what's up? Is there anything wrong?" He sighed into the phone and rubbed his forehead tiredly.

"Nothing's wrong."

Sebastian snorted. "Oh really? So you haven't been ignoring me lately? You haven't gone out of your way to make sure you're not meeting me? You haven't been a jerk and ignoring me completely?"

There was silence for a moment. "…sorry."

"Yeah me too. Can you just tell me why? Did I do something wrong?" Sebastian asked with a confused voice. "Is it about last week in the kitchen? Because if it is then I'm sorry Kurt. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"No Sebastian, I should be the one to apologize." Kurt sighed and Sebastian could almost hear him rubbing a hand up and down his tired face. "It's not your fault at all... I've just been distracted."

Sebastian frowned and nodded before remembering that Kurt couldn't see him. "Okay"

"And I lied. We actually do have plans for today. We're going ice skating on the lake. Do you wanna join us?"

Sebastian's face broke out in a grin and he nodded again before speaking "Yeah, that sounds awesome actually. What time?"

Kurt chuckled "We're leaving in thirty minutes. We can pick you up at your place if you want to?"

"Sure, I'll be ready then."

They both smiled to themselves and said goodbye before hanging up.

* * *

The four of them were walking together on the icy bridge that led them to the little trail that would soon lead them to the lake where the ice was thick enough to skate on.

Sebastian was clad in dark jeans and a thick brown jacket. Kurt wore a black pea-coat together with black jeans and a thick white scarf. Michael wore yellow coveralls and Daisy had similar ones in green.

Sebastian had his own skates hanging over his shoulder and the kid's skates in his hands. Kurt was carrying a bag with hot chocolate and sandwiches.

"Walk carefully now, it's very slippery" Kurt said and adjusted the collar of his jacket so that it would warm his neck.

Michael looked back at them with a mischievous grin and suddenly started running.

"Michael. Michael!" Kurt said sternly and started walking faster to try and catch up with him. "Michael, stop"

Sebastian and Daisy were walking slowly behind them. "Michael, be careful!" Sebastian called out. Daisy rolled her eyes and glared at her little brother.

When Kurt had managed to catch Michael and lift him up in his arms Daisy sighed. "Everybody loves Michael."

Sebastian looked down at her with a confused smile. "Why do you say that?"

Daisy shrugged and looked down at the ice. "Because he's adorable"

Sebastian rolled his eyes fondly and wrapped one arm around her little shoulders as they walked next to each other. "So are you little munchkin. And you're also very beautiful. And funny, and smart. You're way smarter than Michael's tiny little three-year old ass." He joked and nudged her.

She bit her lip and giggled a little.

He smiled at her again and looked out at the water under the bridge. His expression sobered up slightly and he breathed in deeply. "You know your daddy Blaine saved me in that water right there when he were younger. We were swimming in the summer and I was stupid enough to dive head first in the water and hit a rock."

She looked up at him and smiled.

"You know you're like your dad, right?" He said.

"Am I?" she asked with a happy sparkle in her eyes.

He nodded.

"Am I like my other daddy?" she giggled.

He snorted and nodded "Spittin' image"

She beamed at him and he ruffled her hat so that it slid down and covered her eyes. "Just be yourself Daisy, everybody loves you. Come on, let's go before Kurt and Michael get to the ice before us."

* * *

They had decided that Sebastian would skate together with Daisy and that Kurt would skate with Michael since this was Michael's first time skating.

Sebastian was standing on the middle of the ice with Daisy skating in a circle around him, laughing hysterically. "Come on Sebby, don't just stand there!" she laughed.

"Stop teasing me or else I will make a hole in the ice and throw you in" he said mock-sternly.

"No, you love me you wouldn't do that!" She exclaimed and grabbed his hand to drag him around the ice.

Sebastian rolled his eyes fondly and followed her.

At the same time, Kurt and Michael were struggling. Michael was like bambi on ice and couldn't even stand straight, not to mention try to move without falling flat on his face.

Michael was a tough kid so he didn't cry when he fell down, he only giggled and held up his hands for Kurt to help him up again.

After a particularly funny fall (well, Michael seemed to think it was funny at least), Sebastian and Daisy came skating towards them with Sebastian pushing Daisy in front of him.

"How is it going? Is the hobbit managing to skate like a real person?" Sebastian teased and winked at Michael who only giggled harder.

Kurt chuckled "He's getting there. Although only if you count crawling on your stomach or falling on your little butt skating" He shrugged with a smile.

Sebastian laughed "That's the spirit!"

Michael raised his hands towards Sebastian and Sebastian lifted him up in his arms. "Wanna go for a ride little guy?"

"Yes! Go fast like you did with Daisy" Michael exclaimed.

"Alrighty then, fast it is." Sebastian chuckled and turned to Kurt and Daisy. "Come skate with us. We can have a race"

Kurt raised an eyebrow "A race? What are you, five?"

Sebastian rolled his eyes and nudged him. "Come on, it will be fun. Daisy and Michael wants to race, right?"

"Yes! Daddy please race with us, I want to show you how fast I am." Daisy pleaded with big puppy eyes.

"Alright, alright" Kurt rolled his eyes and took his place beside Daisy and Sebastian.

"Ready?" Sebastian looked at the others with raised eyebrows and a mischievous grin.

"YES!" Daisy and Michael screamed and Kurt nodded.

"Set? GO!" Sebastian exclaimed and started skating as fast as he could down the lake with Kurt and Daisy next to him and with Michael cheering on in his arms.

Daisy was the first one to reach the shoreline which was the goal they set. Kurt cheered for her and congratulated her on her win even though he had lost to both her and Sebastian. At the same time Sebastian grumbled about how she only won because he had a kid in his arms and that he didn't want to drop him.

Sebastian sat Michael down on the ice and did a little pirouette to show his skills in ice skating. Kurt rolled his eyes and was just about to skate over to their bags when he felt two strong arms lift him up and spin him around.

"Sebastian! Put me down you caveman!" He screamed.

"Never! You lost and therefore must be punished" Sebastian chuckled.

The kids giggled loudly and clapped their hands when they watched them. Sebastian was just about to put a squirming Kurt down again when his skate caught a bump in the ice and he lost his balance. He fell backwards with a now screaming Kurt still in his arms and they landed tangled together.

Kurt had closed his eyes when they fell and now carefully opened his eyes to check if they were alive. He looked down and saw a smirking Sebastian staring up at him.

"At least I'm soft, right?" Sebastian chuckled in a whisper.

Kurt snorted fondly and hit his shoulder playfully before shrugged himself free. He oddly missed the warmth and strength of Sebastian's arms when he stood up and took a small bow to show the kids that he was alright.

They spent the rest of the afternoon drinking hot chocolate, eating sandwiches and laughing together on the ice.

It was nice.

* * *

**Reviews are lovely**


	9. Chapter 9

_Glee is back and so is One and Only! Yaaay! This took a while to get out once again but now I know that it will take some time to get inspiration between each chapter so I'm not promising weekly updates. I will try but sometimes you're on a roll and sometimes writing is super hard._

_Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or the characters associated to Glee. I wish.._

* * *

Chapter nine.

Kurt woke up early Christmas day. He sat up in bed and stretched his arms with a small smile before climbing out and changing into a stylish yet comfortable outfit for the day. Sebastian was coming over before the kids woke up and they would prepare the gifts and holiday breakfast so that when Michael and Daisy came downstairs they would have the perfect holiday picture in front of them.

When Kurt heard three careful knocks on the front door at exactly six o'clock he smiled softly and tip-toed over to open it.

He carefully opened the door to see a sleepy Sebastian standing there with unruly hair and tired eyes. "You look like hell" Kurt scoffed.

"Yeah well I'm not used to wake up at fucking five am." Sebastian said. "Now let me in, It's fucking freezing out here" he whined and pushed past Kurt to get into the house.

Kurt chuckled and closed the door behind him. "You have to be careful, don't walk too heavy or speak too loud. Michael and Daisy have super-hearing. They once heard the neighbors taking a shower and their shower is in the basement".

Sebastian shot him an amused look as he walked into the kitchen. "Okay _mom_"

Kurt rolled his eyes. "Hey, I can still keep the gift I bought you" he threatened playfully.

That made Sebastian perk up and he smiled that smile that showed all of his white teeth that Kurt liked to call horse teeth even though they didn't look like it at all. "You bought me a gift?"

Kurt smirked "Yes I did."

Sebastian nodded and looked at Kurt with that stupid grin. "Well good, because I have something for you too".

Kurt opened the fridge to pull out ingredients to the breakfast. "Really? And what is that?"

Sebastian raised an eyebrow and scoffed "Do you really think I'm gonna tell you now?"

"It was worth a try."

Sebastian smiled at him and leaned against the kitchen counter. "So, what's the plan? You making breakfast and me doing what?"

"Can you put the presents under the tree?" Kurt said and started cracking eggs to make the saffron-pancakes they always ate at Christmas.

Sebastian nodded and mock-saluted. "Yes sir, right away" he smirked and grabbed both the bag of gifts that Kurt had kept hidden in the basement and the bag he had brought with him from his apartment.

Fifteen minutes later Sebastian walked back into the kitchen with a smirk "All set up for the little monsters. Is the pancakes ready?"

Before Kurt could answer he heard two doors slam upstairs and soon after two pairs of feet were running as fast as they could downstairs. "No running in the stairs" Kurt called out with an amused smile.

The running didn't stop and soon Michael and Daisy were sprinting into the kitchen, screaming "Christmas! Christmas! Christmas!"

"Yes it's Christmas!" Sebastian fake-cheered and lifted Michael up in his arms. Kurt knew that Sebastian was secretly excited.

* * *

They ate the pancakes while happily chatting about what was going on in daycare and what the kids' friends would do over the holidays. Apparently one of Daisy's best friends would spend her Christmas together with her family in Paris which made Kurt gasp in jealousy. Sebastian scoffed at that and muttered 'Paris is not as amazing as you may think'. As soon as they had chewed their last piece of pancake Daisy and Michael sprinted into the living room with excited grins.

"I guess it's time to open gifts" Kurt chuckled and looked after them.

"Yes it is" Sebastian winked and walked into the living room, sitting down on the couch next to the Christmas tree. Kurt rolled his eyes and followed him.

"Alright kids, let's go around and each open one present at a time, ok?"

"Ok Daddy" Michael smiled sweetly and Daisy nodded with a little pout.

Sebastian laughed softly "Cheer up dwarf, you'll get all your presents in time."

They spent the next hour opening presents one at a time. The kids were showered with toys and new clothes (from Kurt, Sebastian would never buy clothes to kids). Kurt and Sebastian both received several drawings and old toys that the kids wanted to give away. It's the thought that counts and all that.

When they were almost finished Daisy grabbed a neatly wrapped present and walked over to Kurt. She looked down at her sock-clad feet before she gave it to Kurt. "Dada, I want to give this to Daddy but I know that I can't give it to him so I'm giving it to you instead".

Kurt's breath hitched in his throat slightly. He didn't want them to forget about Blaine, but it had been a while since they talked about him. He felt Sebastian's comforting hand on his back as he carefully opened the present.

Kurt smiled softly when he saw the colorful drawing. Daisy climbed up onto the sofa and squished herself between Kurt and Sebastian to show them what she had made. "That's me and Michael" she pointed towards the two small figures on the drawing, one with long dark hair and the other with no hair at all for some reason. "And that's you Dada" she pointed at a taller figure next to Michael. "And that's uncle Sebby!" she pointed at an even taller figure next to Daisy. Sebastian chuckled and Kurt smiled at him softly as she continued. "And there's Daddy" she said with a small voice and pointed at the corner of the drawing where a smiley face with black curly hair were drawn as the sun.

"I wanted to draw our family now and show him that I miss him but I'm happy because I know he loves me and that Uncle Sebby and you are good wiff taking care of me and Michael" she smiled a small smile that showed how proud she was of herself.

Kurt wrapped his arms around his daughter and squeezed her tightly "I love it honey... and I'm sure Daddy would have loved it too".

"It's a pretty awesome drawing." Sebastian said and smiled at her.

Her smile widened and she hugged Kurt back before planting a wet kiss on Sebastian's cheek. "Now I'm gonna play with my new cars!" She stated happily and jumped off the couch again.

* * *

A few hours later Kurt and Sebastian threw away all the left over wrapping paper and cleaned up the kitchen. Kurt had just put the last plate in the dishwasher when his sight was blocked by a green object. Kurt blinked to try to focus on the object. He smiled when he saw the box and grabbed it from Sebastian's long fingers. "So this is my gift?" he asked and turned around to see a smirking Sebastian.

"Yup."

"Then I guess it's only fair that you get your gift as well?"

Sebastian's grin grew wider and he nodded "Yup."

Kurt rolled his eyes but smiled and opened the pantry to pull out a small red box. He handed it over to Sebastian. "Who opens first?"

"You go first."

"Okay then…" Kurt smiled and gently tore the wrapping to reveal a black box with golden letters stylishly imprinted on it. Kurt stared at the letters in wonder and then up at Sebastian.

"Just open it Hummel" Sebastian chuckled.

Kurt nodded and opened the box to reveal the most gorgeous scarf he had ever seen. He let his fingers trail over the smooth light blue material and sighed happily. "It's beautiful Seb... But this is way too expensive."

"It's a 'thank you for including me in your life even though I'm a major asshole' gift" Sebastian smiled sheepishly. "It's nothing really."

"B-but it's Marc Jacobs, Seb… I could never afford this now. I don't even know how I could afford it in high school."

Sebastian just shrugged "Like I said, it's nothing compared to what you're doing to me every day."

Kurt wrapped his arms around him in a tight hug "Thank you. And don't be silly, we love you, you don't have to thank us" he smiled.

Sebastian hugged him back and for some unexplainable reason felt his stomach flutter when Kurt told him that they loved him. He swallowed and cleared his throat. "So, uhm… my turn to open my gift?"

Kurt nodded and moved away slightly to watch him open it.

Sebastian took the small red box and quirked an eyebrow at Kurt. "Are you proposing to me Hummel?" he teased.

Kurt rolled his eyes "Just open it."

Sebastian laughed softly and opened the box. He frowned slightly as he looked down into the box. He picked up the small metallic object and held it between his fingers. "You gave me a key?"

Kurt nodded "Yeah. It's a key to the house. I know that you know how to break into the house without leaving any traces," he rolled his eyes teasingly which made Sebastian laugh. ", but I want you to have this. I want you to know that you're always welcome here."

Sebastian stared at Kurt for a long moment before pulling him into a tight hug, feeling his eyes sting a bit from unshed tears. "Thank you." he whispered.

* * *

That night when Kurt had finished his moisturizing routine and put away his new Marc Jacobs scarf he crawled into bed and opened his bedside drawer to pick up his book. As he was about to close the drawer he glanced down again and froze. The letter.

Kurt picked up the letter with slightly trembling fingers and looked at the envelope closely. Should he read it? Was he ready? What would happen to him after he read what Blaine had written many months ago before he was deported?

He took and deep breath and shook his head before putting the letter back in the drawer.

He was starting to feel happy again. Well, as happy as he could be. He still had a constant cloud of grief that followed him around wherever he went, but now there were also glimpses of sunlight. He wanted to keep it like that for as long as possible.

* * *

**R&R**


	10. Chapter 10

_Hello my dear friends. I am truly sorry for this dickhead-move that I pulled. It's been forever since I posted the last chapter. But here I am again and I promise that this chapter is worth the wait haha. (At least I hope so) _

_I want to thank __**nancyconlon**__ for posting a review a week ago or so that made me remember that I actually have a story to write. So thank you. Without you, there would be no tenth chapter today. _

_Disclaimer: As always, I own nothing related to Glee or the movie Brothers._

* * *

Chapter 10.

A few weeks after Christmas and the celebrating of a new year, Kurt came home from work to an eely quiet house. He frowned slightly and put his bag down before unbuttoning his jacket.

"Hello?" He called out as he hung the jacket up on the hook next to Sebastian's jacket. This must mean that he's not alone after all. Plus, the kids' clothes and shoes were in the hallway as well.

Kurt chuckled slightly when he saw a crayon-written sign with a smiley on the stairs. "Do not go up!" Under the text was an arrow that pointed to another sign on the floor. Kurt followed all the arrows that were painted in different colors until he reached the kitchen. On the floor of the kitchen there was another sign but on this one there was no text, simply a smiley.

Kurt looked around the empty kitchen and chuckled, waiting for something to happen.

After a few seconds there was a loud cheering "Happy birthday!" Daisy, Michael, Sebastian, Burt, Carole, Finn and Rachel jumped up from their hiding spot behind the kitchen island.

Kurt gasped and laughed softly as Michael and Daisy attacked him with hugs. "Oh my god, is it my birthday?" he joked and lifted them both up in his arms. He turned around and saw that Wes, Trent, David, Sam, Mercedes and Nick also were there, coming into the kitchen from their hiding spot in the living room. "Thank you guys, you really didn't have to do this for me" Kurt bit his lip softly but smiled gratefully at them.

Sebastian grinned at him and walked up to them, giving the three of them a big hug. "Oh shut up Hummel, you deserve this."

He pulled back and gave Kurt another warm smile before letting Kurt's other family and friends take turns in hugging him.

After each hug Kurt would flicker his eyes back to Sebastian again, only to find him already staring back.

"Do you like the kitchen Dada?" Daisy beamed at Kurt and threw her hands out to gesture to the walls of the kitchen. Kurt looked up and for the first time noticed that there was something different with the room.

The walls were now a beautiful purplish-grey and someone had put in new cabinets to replace the old ones that Blaine and he had chosen when they first moved in and couldn't afford anything better.

"Oh.. wow.." Kurt whispered quietly and stared at the walls. He felt a hand on his shoulder and a soft voice in his ear as Sebastian leaned down to whisper.

"You don't have to like it, I can re-do it or put back the old ones if you want to."

"N-no. No, it's perfect" Kurt nodded and turned to smile at Sebastian. "Did you do this all by yourself?"

Sebastian smiled a lopsided smile and shrugged as he scratched his neck sheepishly. "Nah, I had help from the guys." He gestured towards Wes, David and Trent who all rolled their eyes.

"It was mostly him, we only helped" David smiled.

Kurt chuckled and put the kids down before stepping closer to Sebastian again. He wrapped his arms around Sebastian's neck and tried to ignore how perfectly they fit together as Sebastian wrapped his arms around his waist. "Thank you Seb"

After a while it was time for cake and presents. Daisy and Michael dragged Kurt to the living room couch and handed him present after present from his loved ones.

"This is from Uncle Trent!" Michael beamed and handed Kurt a box neatly wrapped in blue paper. Kurt took it and smiled at Trent who only nodded at him and chuckled.

Michael stood next to Kurt as he rather absentmindedly started opening the gift. His mind was on other places. Namely on a certain tall man who at the moment were helping Carole light the candles on the cake.

"Can I help you open it?" Michael huffed after Kurt had taken far too long to unwrap the gift.

"Oh, sure sweetie" Kurt smiled and handed Michael the gift. He was for some unexplainable reason far too out of the moment to be able to concentrate on such a simple task.

He heard an excited squeal and the tearing of paper. He put on an excited smile and thanked whoever it was that gave him the gifts.

It wasn't that he was ungrateful. Not at all, Kurt was almost moved to tears by the simple fact that his friends cared so much about him. But he was distracted to say the least. Distracted by his loneliness after Blaine's death and lately of his rising feelings for his late husband's best friend.

While he was watching his son open up his gifts Sebastian was busy in the kitchen. Carole held up the huge cake in front of him and he was lighting the candles, trying to shield the cake from Kurt's vision with his body. "Is he looking?"

Carole raised an amused eyebrow at him and peeked into the living room to see if Kurt was watching them. "No, not this time either" she chuckled which earned her a pout from Sebastian.

"I just want to surprise him" He said in mock-defense.

Carole laughed softly and nodded. "I know Sebastian, and you're doing a very good job" she assured him with a pat to his cheek.

Burt walked past them into the living room and mumbled something to Sebastian and patted his shoulder.

Sebastian looked after Burt with a surprised expression before turning to Carole again. "What did he say?"

"He said that you did a good job with the kitchen" she smiled gently which made Sebastian beam proudly.

"Come on, let's surprise him now" Carole winked teasingly and started walking into the living room, beginning to sing "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you.."

Sebastian followed her and sang along with a smile at Kurt.

"Happy birthday dear Kurt… Happy birthday to you". While the last notes of the song rang out Kurt stared into the candles of the cake. He was sort of captivated by the fire. Captivated by the fact that those candles represented another year going by. Another year that for the half part had been a nightmare. He couldn't let another year go by with that much heartache and grief. The kids couldn't handle it and neither could he. No, this year would be different. This year would be a good year even if he had to lock himself into his bedroom and cry every night. This year would be a good year for Daisy and Michael.

"Blow out the candles Dada, come on!" Daisy squealed in delight which made Kurt snap out of his thoughts. He looked around the room at his family and friends who were all staring expectantly at him and smiled warmly before he blew out the candles, wishing for happiness for his children.

* * *

Later that night when the guests had all gone home and Daisy and Michael were tucked in and sound asleep Kurt leaned against the kitchen counter with a tired sigh. It had been a long day and the only one that was still around was Sebastian. He had insisted on helping Kurt clean up "Come on, it's your birthday. Chill out for a bit, will you?" was his argument. Kurt had happily agreed and that's how they ended up here. Kurt was leaning against the kitchen counter, watching Sebastian do the dishes.

"Thank you Seb" Kurt smiled at him and propped his chin up on his hand.

Sebastian gave him an unamused look and snorted. "You've been thanking me a lot today, I think it's enough princess".

Kurt just chuckled and kept watching him until he was done with the last plate. Sebastian glanced over at Kurt and gave him a half-smile before turning towards a cupboard. He opened it and pulled out a bottle of red wine. "Come on, let's relax for a while" he walked past Kurt and nudged his hip playfully before walking into the living room.

Kurt raised an eyebrow and watched Sebastian as he walked away. He couldn't deny that a glass of wine would be pretty good at the moment so he grabbed two glasses and followed him.

"So I hit him" Sebastian sighed and looked down at his glass. They were sitting on the carpet next to the fireplace. There was no open fire in there but they had lit a few candles and placed in the fireplace so that it wouldn't be completely dark. They were both on their third glass and their topics of conversation had changed from fashion to Daisy's kindergarten teacher to Sebastian's alcoholic uncle.

"I've never told anyone this before. I was too ashamed" Sebastian sighed. "He- my uncle, used to come home from work six hours later than he was supposed to, drunk out of his mind and yelling at me. He used to tell me just how useless I was and how it wasn't surprising at all that my parents kicked me out". Sebastian spoke quietly with a bitter edge in his voice.

"One night he snapped. I guess someone had given him one too many drinks because he could barely stand up straight. He went out to the garage and grabbed an old baseball bat. He then threatened me that if I didn't get my faggy self out on the streets, earning him some money for his drinking, then he would kill me."

Kurt shivered at the thought of a young, scared Sebastian, being threatened to his life by his own uncle. He placed a gentle hand on Sebastian's arm and gave him a reassuring smile that he could continue with his story.

Sebastian met Kurt's eyes and held contact for a few moments before nodding. He looked back down at the carpet and shrugged. "So I just hit him. I hit him as hard as I could and then I ran. I haven't seen him since." He sighed.

Kurt looked at the tall man, sitting on the carpet, now looking so small in a way. He squeezed Sebastian's arm and swallowed before speaking. "I'm proud of you"

Sebastian turned his head to look at Kurt with a new hopeful glint in his eyes that Kurt couldn't quite place. "Really?"

Kurt simply nodded and smiled before moving back a bit, creating some space between the two of them.

Kurt looked down and took a sip of his wine while Sebastian kept his searching eyes on him. After a few seconds Sebastian reached into his pocket and pulled out a package of cigarettes. He held them up and raised an eyebrow. "Can I smoke in here?"

Kurt just shrugged "Sure, we're sitting by the fireplace so I guess it's okay."

Sebastian smirked and pulled out a lighter before putting a cigarette between his lips. He held up his hands to shield the cigarette and then lit it. He took a deep drag of the smoke before he spoke again.

"You know when I was.. 17 or 18.." he turned a bit to fiddle with the radio where an old hip hop song played. He turned up the volume and smiled. "I used to listen to this song over and over again".

Kurt raised his eyebrows and shook his head. "Me too"

Sebastian scoffed and looked Kurt up and down "Really?"

"Why is that so surprising?" Kurt said with a bitchy edge in his tone.

Sebastian chuckled and shrugged "I don't know.. I just," he took a drag of his cigarette again. "I took you more of a Broadway, never gonna listen to the radio, kind of guy."

Kurt gaped and laughed "Fuck you, give me that you asshole" he said and reached for the cigarette.

"Really?"

"Mhm"

Sebastian grinned at him and shook his head in amusement before giving Kurt the smoke. Kurt smirked and put the cigarette between his lips before taking a long drag. He then moved over closer to the fireplace and closer to Sebastian to blow out the smoke into the fireplace. He then sat down there next to a grinning Sebastian to be closer to the vent.

"You think I'm such a square" Kurt commented and looked at Sebastian.

"I'm starting to reevaluate you, Snoop Dogg" Sebastian chuckled.

Kurt rolled his eyes but laughed softly. They kept eye contact for a few seconds before Kurt handed Sebastian the cigarette again. Sebastian took it without a word and kept looking at Kurt as he took a drag.

Kurt blinked a few times and smiled before grabbing his glass again. "You know, just because I was a cheerleader for a while and was into musical theatre doesn't mean that I didn't appreciate... you know."

"Yeah, and you were dating the perfect dream boat of the school" Sebastian pointed out and raised an eyebrow.

Kurt shook his head and laughed "Oh god, I'm such a cliché."

Sebastian smiled at him and looked at the candles before glancing back at Kurt. "You were kind of a pain in the ass, you got to admit that."

Kurt frowned and shook his head. "No I wasn't. Guys always say that I'm stuck up because I wouldn't talk to them." He said and turned that frown into a small smile. "I just didn't like you. You were always so rude and tried to get Blaine to come out with you to go to bars or whatever."

Sebastian looked at him and nodded. "I guess we both have changed a lot, huh".

Kurt nodded but didn't reply. He looked into Sebastian's green eyes and noticed how close they were sitting. He could practically smell Sebastian from where he was sitting and to be honest, the smell was intoxicating. Sebastian's face was one of determination when his eyes flickered down to Kurt's lips. He looked back up into Kurt's eyes before pushing himself up slightly and moved closer to Kurt. He swallowed and closed his eyes before he pressed his lips gently to Kurt's, capturing those pink lips in a sweet kiss.

Kurt wasted no time kissing back. He was a bit surprised by the kiss but for some reason that he couldn't care less of thinking about in this state, he liked it. He liked it so much that he opened his mouth and let Sebastian's tongue battle with his own for dominance and reached up one of his hands to thread into Sebastian's hair.

After a few seconds of kissing they broke apart and stared at each other, panting harshly. That moment didn't last for long before Kurt smashed their lips together again roughly.

Sebastian circled Kurt's waist with his arms and pulled him closer, tilting their bodies so that Sebastian were hovering over Kurt, not breaking the kiss once.

Their kissing turned rougher and needier by the second and Kurt was practically whimpering by the sensation of being kissed like this again. It had been so long since he had felt someone in his arms. Blaine had been deported over six months ago and-

Wait... Blaine.

Kurt broke the kiss with a gasp and pushed Sebastian away. He put a hand to his mouth and stared at Sebastian who wore a confused frown. "What the?" Sebastian began before Kurt abruptly stood up, causing Sebastian to lose his balance and falling onto the floor.

"I need some fresh air" Kurt whispered and ran out of the living room, out onto the front porch. He sat down on the front steps and put his head in his hands.

He couldn't even cry anymore. He just felt the guilt wash over him. Blaine had only been dead for a few months and he couldn't even keep it in his pants. Good job Kurt, such a good role model for the kids. And what would Blaine say if he was still around?

Back in the living room Sebastian stared at the candles in the fire place. How could he be so stupid? He had one thing left in his life that he loved and he had to go ruin that too. Way to go Sebastian. And you also betrayed your best friend. Your best friend who is dead. Your best friend who never did anything to hurt or harm you in any way.

Sebastian felt his face crumble up and he bit his lip to keep in the sobs that he knew were coming.

* * *

Kurt spent two hours on that porch in the cold. He barely noticed when Sebastian left to go home. He just sat there.

* * *

**Reviews are lovely.**


	11. Chapter 11

_Hello again. I'm not even gonna apologize for my absence. You guys probably know how sorry I am by now. I'm working all the time and when I'm not working I'm too tired to write anything good. _

_I am currently pretty much stuck. I don't know where I want to take this story and how I want it to end. As you guys probably understand, there are two possible endings. I'm now deciding between those two. If you feel like it, please put your opinion in a PM or as a review. _

_This is sort of a short filler chapter but it's very important for the story. Let's get to it!_

* * *

Chapter eleven.

His mind was going wild. He felt like a mad person and he were probably slowly going insane. Or that's how it felt like for Kurt anyway.

Okay, so to break things down to facts. Sebastian and he kissed. It felt amazing. So amazing that he didn't want to stop. Yet, he did stop it when he thought about his dead husband. Now he feels really hurt by himself and incredibly guilty. It almost feels like he's cheating on his dead husband, which is a pretty horrifying thought. Did it count as cheating? They are still married after all... even if one of them is dead.

And Sebastian… he is just so amazing. If Kurt was being completely honest with himself, he felt… something when he was with the taller man. Something new and yet familiar. Something exciting. Sebastian was like a fresh breath of air in a foggy room filled with grief. He gave Kurt an escape and something to look forward to.

He loved spending time with his kids and family, his job was challenging and that provided a slight distraction too, but nothing got his mind off of Blaine and his misery nearly as much as Sebastian did.

Now he had a dilemma. Should he contact Sebastian and talk about what happened between them, sort it out and try to move past it? Or should he contact Sebastian, talk about what happened and try to get something more out of it? Or his last option, not contact Sebastian at all?

Turns out, he didn't have to make the decision himself. Kurt snapped out of his inner monologue when he heard a key slowly and carefully turn in the front door. The only person besides himself that owned a key to the house was Sebastian so it couldn't really be anyone else, unless the man had been robbed. That wasn't exactly unlikely considering Sebastian's money and clean style. He would actually be an obvious target if a thief were roaming the streets, looking for someone to steal money from.

Kurt snorted to himself and got off the couch. Carole had taken Daisy and Michael to a trip to a new fun-land just outside of Ohio. Apparently it had a huge trampoline and free cotton candy, which was pretty much everything the kids needed in order to jump up and down and nearly pass out from excitement.

"Sebastian?" He called out in question while he rounded the corner to the hallway. What he found there nearly made him laugh. He probably would have laughed if their… situation had been different.

Sebastian was hunched forward slightly, sort of like a burglar in movies who doesn't want to be seen, clutching the key tightly in his hands and staring at Kurt with big eyes. "Uhm… I.. I was just on my way out" Sebastian quickly lied and then rolled his eyes at his own idiocy.

Kurt quirked an eyebrow and gave him his best judging look before crossing his arms over his chest with a heavy sigh. "Sebastian. Tell me the real reason why you look like a thief. Now" He said impatiently.

When he understood that Kurt meant serious business Sebastian groaned in annoyance and straightened up again so that he was at his full height. He turned to face Kurt and swallowed before he began to speak. "I wanted to leave you a letter but I didn't think you were home. Your car is gone so I assumed that you were too".

After that there were a few seconds of uncomfortable silence where they just looked at each other. Sebastian with his arms hanging by his sides and Kurt with his crossed over his chest.

"Why did you want to leave me a letter?" Kurt finally said softly with a slight frown in his eyebrows. What was so unimportant that Sebastian couldn't bother to say it in person and yet still so important that he had to tell him somehow.

"I have been thinking a lot." Sebastian started. "About what happened between us a couple of days ago" He said softly and glanced down and then up at Kurt again. Kurt breathed in deeply and opened his mouth to say something but Sebastian raised his hand to silence him. "Please Kurt, let me talk. This is hard enough for me to say without you interrupting me". Kurt nodded slowly and gestured with his hand for Sebastian to continue.

"Okay, let's just rip the fucking thing off" Sebastian mumbled to himself before he started talking again. "I've been thinking. About you, about me, about… about Blaine. And it all kills me so much Kurt. It kills me to finally realize that I'm falling for you and I can't do anything about it." He took a brief pause in his little speech to take a deep breath and look down at the carpet. "I feel awful for feeling this way. I don't want you to think that you have to do anything or say anything back because I know that you're still not over Blaine. I know that and I understand that."

"The thing is. I'm not whole. I'm not even a piece of a shattered mirror. I'm… I'm nothing" he chuckled without even the slightest trace of humor and shook his head. "And I know that that sounds really pathetic and emotional but that's the truth. The only good thing in my life right now is you. You and Daisy and Michael. The three of you are my perfect things and you're not even mine. You are still married to Blaine, you still love Blaine. I love Blaine too, he's still my best friend even if he can't be here anymore" Sebastian's voice cracked slightly at the last part but he clenched his jaw and swallowed down the lump in his throat.

"I-I'm rambling" Sebastian sighed and shook his head. "I'm sorry for bothering you. The last thing I want to do is to cause any more pain to you and that's exactly what I'm doing right now. I'm so sorry Kurt" Sebastian looked into Kurt's stunned blue eyes with his own watery, sad, green ones.

Kurt just stared at him with a slightly open mouth. His hands had fallen down from his hips and he couldn't bring himself to say a word. The shorter man's silence was enough confirmation for Sebastian that this had been a devastatingly bad idea. He gave Kurt one last nod before he started to turn around and walk out of the house again.

The sound of the doorknob turning was what snapped Kurt out of his state of shock. "Bas!" He said quickly with an alarming panic in his voice. "I…" When Sebastian turned around to look at him with that hopeful glint in his eyes Kurt couldn't bring himself to say what he wanted to say. He wasn't ready but at the same time he was. He wanted love, he needed love, and he wanted love from Sebastian. He still missed Blaine every day and he would die to bring his husband back to life but Sebastian was there. Sebastian was falling for him and if Kurt was being honest, he was falling for the taller man too.

"Can you come back later?" Was what Kurt finally managed to squeak out. "The kids are having dinner at my dad's house and… I need some time to think."

Sebastian gave him a small smile and a nod "Of course. I'll be back later before dinner time" He said. He then left with a small wave of his hand.

After that Kurt stood in front of the front door with a confused expression on his face. Why was life so unfair? Why was everything so confusing? This was probably the first time in his life that he felt like he had absolutely no control over the situation he was in and it scared him to no ends.

* * *

"Dad… I need to talk to someone. I'm going insane" Kurt sniffed out into the phone. It had been two hours since Sebastian left the house and he hadn't managed to straighten out a single thought in his head.

"Are you alright kiddo?" Burt's burly but soft and compassionate voice rang out into the phone.

Kurt swallowed thickly and shook his head before speaking. "No. I'm so confused..."

"What's wrong Kurt? I can hear you're crying and you never cry. You didn't even cry when your cat died when you were twelve. Come on, spit it out"

Kurt sighed and started talking. "Sebastian is falling in love with me. He's falling in love with me and I'm falling in love with him. It's horrible" He choked out and put a shaky hand to his forehead.

The phone was silent for a few seconds.

"I know."

Kurt stopped crying and frowned into the phone. "You know? You know what?" He asked and wiped away the tears under his eyes.

"I know that you love each other. You and Sebastian. Hell, I raised you Kurt. I know practically everything about you. Every little sign of distress and every little look you give people. I've seen it before, remember?" He chuckled a little.

"Wh-.. you.. Why didn't you tell me that?" Kurt huffed in annoyance. "I mean, I know I like him. He's amazing. Both with the kids and as a person. I just, I can't let go." His voice trailed off at the last sentence and he bit his lip while he waited for his dad's response.

"Listen kid… If you choose to start something with Sebastian then that's your choice to make, not mine. But know this, just because you allow yourself to love someone else, doesn't mean that you doesn't love Blaine just as much or even more. It doesn't make you a bad person. I know Blaine and he would have wanted you to be happy. He would have wanted you to move on. And to be completely fair… it's been six months since he died. Nine months since he went away. Some people move on a lot faster than that."

That was everything that Kurt needed to hear. "Thank you dad. I have to go, I have some stuff I need to take care of. Kiss Daisy and Michael for me and remember that Michael can't have broccoli, he's allergic."

Burt just chuckled and nodded "Yes, yes I know. Now go get him" he grinned and pressed the red button on his phone.

* * *

_So, there it is. I'm sorry if some of you think that they are going too fast but I didn't want to drag it out too much. I still have more plans for this story, it's far from over haha. _

**Reviews are lovely and I'll try to update sooner next time. **


	12. Chapter 12

_How come I always take months to update, thinking that I might as well cancel the story since I never have any inspiration. But then someone sends me a review and I get all giddy and excited and write a chapter in one sitting. I'm annoying. I apologize. But thanks for the reviews. I read every single one and I love them all. Even if you have constructive criticism, I take it!_

_P.S. I have completely lost track of what month this story take time in right now so please be patient if I take you back or forward a few months. Just play along._

* * *

Chapter 12.

It took Kurt another two hours to make both himself and the house ready for the arrival of Sebastian. He was never fussy about how the house looked or how many toys were scattered over the floors whenever Sebastian visited before but this was different. This time they would meet as possibly something more than just close friends. They would possible meet for the first time as possible…. No.

He had put on a pair of charcoal grey slacks that he rarely used because expensive, nice pants like these weren't exactly ideal while dealing with basically toddlers. He once got drool on a jacket from Marc Jacob's S/S 2016 collection and that was the last time he wore anything expensive around the kids.

He was just putting away the vacuum cleaner when he heard the familiar sound of a key turning in the front door again. It was still new but he had begun to reminisce the sound with Sebastian. It was a comforting sound that he was quite fond of. He never thought something as simple as the sound of a metal object turning in a wooden door would bring him so much comfort and joy but it did. It really did.

Kurt closed his eyes and put his hands on his stomach as he breathed in deeply before he exhaled again. In, out. In, out, in out. After a moment he opened his eyes again. The breathing exercise didn't really help and because if it he hadn't noticed that Sebastian had already walked into the house and was now staring at him with a confused (and slightly amused) frown. "Uhm, Kurt? What are you doing?" He asked and masked his chuckle with a small cough.

Kurt exhaled quickly with a small laugh. "Oh, sorry." He said and wrung his hands together nervously. Sebastian kept his eyes trained on Kurt's and nodded slowly. There was a silence that stretched between them for at least thirty seconds before Kurt snapped back to reality with a small shake of his head and blurted out "I cooked!"

"Sorr-" Sebastian began to ask with his head tilted to the side but Kurt cut him off with an annoyed huff. "What I mean is that I cooked for you. And me. Because we need to talk and I was stressed and confused and when I'm stressed out I cook." He shrugged and looked around, not really wanting to meet Sebastian's eyes anymore since he just embarrassed himself.

"Okay"

* * *

Despite their awkward start, the following minutes flew by rather smoothly. They sat down at the kitchen table that Kurt had set since he didn't want to over-do it. He had used his everyday china, not the fancy ones that he and Blaine had gotten as a wedding gift. He hadn't put out a vase of flowers or anything extra like that. This was a somewhat special occasion but he didn't want to scare Sebastian away when he finally had come to a conclusion about what he wanted himself.

He put out the plates in front of Sebastian and himself, poured them both a glass of red wine and then they started eating. Sebastian complimented him on his cooking and assured him that he was starving even though Kurt could smell the hot dog he had eaten thirty minutes before he arrived. That was one of Kurt's many talents. He could smell unhealthy food and snacks from miles away.

"So... you said you wanted to talk?" Sebastian began a little hesitantly, taking a sip of his wine to wash down the mushroom risotto.

Kurt swallowed his much smaller bite and nodded. "Yes." He put his fork down and turned to face Sebastian. "You're falling for me." He said is as a statement, not a question. It was a fact, not something they could afford to think about any further. "You're falling for me and I'm falling for you" he said and before Sebastian could even finish turning the sides of his mouth up into a smile Kurt cut him off once again. "But I'm not ready to be in an official relationship."

Sebastian's small smile turned slightly stiff but he nodded still. "Yeah, yeah I understand that. That's... completely fine."

Kurt smiled his first smile of the evening then. "Good. Uhm... So what happens now?" He glanced down and started playing with his fork that was lying on his napkin on the table.

Sebastian swallowed and pursed his lips slightly. "I don't know. I haven't really done this before… The whole falling for my best friend's husband and getting him to fall for me back without being ready to be in a relationship. It's a nugget". He shrugged and cracked one of his most charming smiles which made Kurt laugh.

"Yeah, it's a mess" Kurt agreed. "Why don't we just take this one step at a time?" He said and tilted his head to the side. "We'll act like we normally do but with the knowledge that we're into each other. And slowly progress from there?"

Sebastian's smile grew as he nodded. "Sounds good to me."

"Okay" Kurt smiled.

"Okay."

* * *

They finished their meal with comfortable conversations and laughs. They didn't kiss or talk about their feelings any further but Sebastian at one point slid his foot over to touch Kurt's under the table. The only reaction he got out of Kurt then was a blush and a small stutter but other than that, completely innocent.

* * *

The following weeks practically flew by in a blur of visits to the park and Sebastian stopping by to help with the kitchen or play with the kids. It was the most comfortable and at ease that Kurt had felt in what was coming up to a year. He was slowly starting to feel happy again.

Until one sunny, snowy Saturday in February.

Kurt was inside washing dishes from the lunch they had just finished. Sebastian, Daisy and Michael were playing outside in the backyard with the snow.

"Get it on! Just get it on Michael!" Daisy squealed and clapped her hands because Sebastian was holding Michael up airplane style in front of their new-built snowman. Michael was red in his face from excitement and the cold, holding the head of the snowman tightly in his small hands.

"Just put it there on top little man, I can't hold you forever" Sebastian joked with a laugh and cheered when Michael finally dropped the smaller ball of snow onto the middle part.

Sebastian looked up and grinned at Kurt who was standing by the open window in the kitchen. "We need a nose!" He shouted which made Kurt roll his eyes but laugh. He walked over to the fridge and took out a carrot before throwing it out the window to the kids. "Here, enjoy."

"Thank you Dada!"

Kurt chuckled and shook his head, picking up a glass to dry off as he continued to watch their play in the snow. When the snowman was finished they moved on to a snowball fight. The kids against Sebastian. It was a pretty hilarious sight; Daisy and Michael scrambling to gather snow for their balls and throwing them in a completely off-direction, not hitting Sebastian once. Sebastian just stood there with an unimpressed grin, not even bothering to throw anything back at them.

"Did you teach them to throw a snowball? They can't even hit me" He snorted and looked at Kurt. Just then Daisy had gathered enough snow for an impressively large snowball and threw it square in Sebastian's face.

Kurt smirked and pointed his towel at Sebastian. "Don't mess with them, they know how to fight" he chuckled.

With a growl Sebastian started gathering snow, running towards the kids and dropping it all on them, which made them fall to the ground with squeals and laughs. Kurt rolled his eyes fondly and put his towel down when the house phone rang.

"Hello?" He answered with a small chuckle, keeping one eye on the events outside.

"Hello. Is this Mr. Kurt Hummel-Anderson speaking?" A gruff male voice asked in the other line.

"Yes this is he."

Kurt heard the man clear his throat on the other line before he began to speak again. "Mr Hummel-Anderson, I'm sorry to call you on your weekend like this but I think you want to hear what we have to say this time."

Kurt raised his eyebrows. "Oh?" He asked. Somehow he found the voice on the other line familiar. Like something from a dream or from the past.

"Yes. I am very pleased to tell you that your husband, Mr. Blaine Hummel-Anderson has been found on field and is alive. He is wounded and has been taken care of this last week by our army hospital but he is ready to be shipped back to America again within a few days."

The officer kept talking but Kurt was stood frozen by the window. He couldn't move, he couldn't listen to whatever the man was saying, he could barely breathe. He recognized that voice now. It was the man who had gathered the soldiers together at the airport when Blaine was shipped off. The voice that symbolized his husband's departure was now the voice that he would forever remember as the one who brought him home again.

Sebastian looked up and noticed Kurt's shocked expression. He frowned and stood up, raising his eyebrows in question at Kurt. Kurt just shook his head and looked down into the sink filled with dishwater.

When the final shock had settled Kurt closed his eyes and swallowed.

"Hello? Mr Hummel-Anderson? Are you there?"

"Uhm.. yes. Thank you." He managed to say in a weak voice.

"Okay. Your husband will arrive at the Lima airport on Wednesday at approximately two o'clock. I will see you there. Have a good day."

They hung up and Kurt looked back outside. Daisy and Michael continued their oblivious playing but Sebastian had disappeared. He felt a hand on his shoulder and jumped slightly before turning around.

"Hey, what's going on?" Sebastian asked with his head tilted to the side in worry and confusion.

That's when Kurt felt the tears coming. He broke out in a bright smile and looked up into Sebastian's eyes.

"He's coming home."

* * *

**Reviews are lovely. **

**And please don't kill me. **


	13. Chapter 13

_I'm back and it didn't take me months to update this time! Score! _

_From now on this story is gonna involve a lot of Blaine. I know that some of you might not like that but keep in mind that this is still Kurtbastian endgame and we have to have our obstacles before we can reach our happy ending. Also, I am against all Blaine-bashing. I love the character Blaine so I would never do that. What can be imprinted as Blaine-bashing in this story is simply something that most soldiers go through after they've survived a war. Emotional scars change people and that's what I want to show here. Also, this is a romance/angst story. It's not gonna be fluff all the way. _

_Read and enjoy._

* * *

Chapter 13.

The kids had taken the news quite well. Daisy had screamed and jumped up and down while Michael had tilted his head to the side in confusion when Kurt had told them that their Daddy would come home again. "But Dada… you told me that Daddy died. Did you lie to me?" He pouted and crossed his arms over his chest.

"No sweetie, I didn't lie to you" Kurt smiled and lifted Michael up to sit in his lap. "We all thought that Daddy went to heaven but we were wrong. And now he's coming back to us, isn't that wonderful?" He smiled and kissed Michael's forehead gently while stroking back a strand of chestnut hair.

"Yeah" Michael smiled and bit his bottom lip. Kurt knew that Michael didn't really understand completely but that was fine, he didn't understand everything yet either. All he knew was that Blaine had been found captured by the enemy where he had been held hostage for months. He was safe now and that's all that matters but he didn't know much other than that.

They were now standing in the arrival hall of the very small Lima airport, watching Blaine's place fly onto the runway. The airport was rarely used for tourist flights as it was too small, so it was perfect for private planes and business flights. There were two other families there who Kurt had politely nodded at when they first arrived, thinking that they must belong to one of the officers or another soldier on his or her way home.

Kurt bit his lip nervously and tightened his hold on Daisy's shoulders. Michael was holding Sebastian's hand as he had come with them as a driver and an extended family member. Others might think it looked weird but he was Blaine's best friend after all. He was family. And right now Kurt couldn't bear to think of him as anything else than Blaine's best friend. Not when he was seconds from seeing his husband for the first time since the end of the summer.

The plane finally came to a stop and the doors opened. It was one of those smaller military planes that only had room for a limited amount of passengers. The first person who came out of the place was an Asian-looking man with a sergeant's hat who Kurt instantly recognized as the man who had called him a few days ago to deliver the news.

"Can I go out there?" Daisy asked with excitement coloring her voice.

"No sweetie, we have to wait." Kurt said and squeezed her shoulder.

"Why?"

"Because we have to be patient." Kurt said and smiled down at his kids reassuringly.

The first thing that Kurt noticed when Blaine stepped off the plane was his appearance. They had shaved off his short, curly hair which left him looking smaller than before. He was also skinnier and had a nasty, red scar on his neck. The second thing, and the most frightening thing, he noticed was Blaine's eyes. The eyes that once looked so innocent and pure were now hard and cold.

Blaine smiled a slightly tight and small, but still real smile and waved at his family when he got off the plane. When he got closer to the arrival hall they opened the doors for them to walk out and Daisy and Michael squealed and started running towards Blaine.

"Daddy!"

Kurt followed them with a smile and didn't notice that Sebastian lingered at the door, hesitant to break up the family reunion.

"I missed you so much!" Daisy exclaimed and threw herself in Blaine's arms when he had kneeled down in front of them. He wrapped both of the kids up in a tight hug and said with a slightly deeper voice than Kurt remembered. "I missed you too… my babies."

He closed his eyes and breathed in their sent before looking up at Kurt.

Kurt didn't say anything, he just looked at Blaine with big eyes and an uncertain smile, not sure if he should laugh or cry. Blaine let go of Daisy and Michael and stood up before stepping forward and wrapping his arms around Kurt in a tight hug.

"I missed you" Kurt whispered and felt tears well up in his eyes again. He didn't know how many tears of joy he had cried since he got the phone call and here he goes again.

"Me too." Blaine whispered back before letting go again. He looked into Kurt's eyes for a moment and Kurt almost leaned in for a kiss but before he could come so far, Blaine was bending down to pick up his bag.

Instead of feeling rejected Kurt grabbed Michael's hand and together the four of them walked back into the arrival hall.

Kurt had almost forgotten that Sebastian was waiting for them in there but when he spotted him he offered a small, grateful smile.

Blaine and Sebastian hugged each other tightly. Kurt could hear Sebastian mumble "Welcome home" which was received with a curt nod before they pulled apart and Blaine continued to walk towards the exit.

Something was definitely wrong with Blaine. Kurt had expected him to have emotional scars from war, he wasn't stupid. But this was something way worse than he had imagined. Blaine showed no emotions whatsoever and now that Kurt thought about it, they hadn't told each other that they loved each other. They always did that. It was like saying Hello for them. It was their thing.

He swallowed thickly and tugged on Michael's hand a little so that they could keep up with Blaine as they walked out to the car.

* * *

Sebastian dropped them off at their house, telling them that he should head home to do some unfinished work he had due in the morning the next day. Blaine thanked him for the ride and then let Daisy and Michael drag him into the house to show him the new kitchen.

Kurt lingered a little by the car and leaned down to look at Sebastian through the rolled down window. "Thanks for the ride Sebastian… Are you sure you don't want to stay for coffee or something?" He asked.

Sebastian stared at him for a moment with a thoughtful look on his face that made Kurt squirm before shaking his head slowly. "Uhm, no. You need to spend some time together as a family Kurt. And besides, I do have work to do at home" He said with a small sigh.

They could both sense that they were back where they started. Sure, they had admitted their feelings for each other but that was before they knew that Blaine was alive and on his way back home. Now they were back at polite greetings and strictly platonic feelings again. To be honest, Sebastian felt like he was drowning and that was why he had to leave. He wouldn't tell Kurt that but that was the only reason, not some stupid paperwork that he would finish in an hour and then spend the rest of the night drinking beer and refusing to feel anything. Just like the old days.

"Okay" Kurt said with a small smile. "Have a nice day. I'll see you around" He said and bit his lip before straightening up his posture and disappearing into the house too.

It was with mixed feelings that Sebastian drove home to his shitty but expensive apartment again. What was he supposed to do now?

* * *

Kurt found the kids and Blaine in the kitchen, looking at the new cupboards.

"Do you like it? Do you like it?" Daisy beamed up at her father and tugged a little on his hand.

"Wow, it's amazing." Blaine nodded and smiled down at her.

Michael put his hands over his mouth and ran over to Kurt. "Dada, I think he likes it!" He whispered and Kurt nodded with a small chuckle. "Yeah, I think so too."

"Who did it?" Blaine asked and walked forward to examine the new paint on the walls.

"I did!" Michael exclaimed and hid his face in Kurt's side with a cheeky giggle.

"You did?" Blaine turned to smile at his son.

"And Uncle Sebby" Michael nodded with his face still in Kurt's side.

"Uncle Sebby and his three amigos" Daisy beamed. Trent had taught her that word a few weeks ago and now she used it whenever she mentioned one of Sebastian's friends.

Blaine just raised his eyebrows and nodded, looking around the kitchen once again before he decided that he wanted to see if they had changed anything else in the house. Kurt looked at him and tilted his head to the side but just followed them when they started to walk through all the rooms. He knew that the only room they had redecorated was the kitchen but Blaine seemed somewhat suspicious of something so he just let him take his time to look at everything once again.

After going through every room once they arrived to Kurt and Blaine's bedroom. Ever so slowly, Blaine walked up to their neatly made bed. He looked around at the closed closet door, the full-length mirror in the corner, the little desk with a laptop on it that stood against a wall and then finally their bed.

Kurt were holding Michael in his arms since the little boy had been bored of the tour of the house after three rooms and were now resting his head against Kurt's shoulder. Daisy stood in the middle of the room, looking at Blaine with a smile and Kurt stood behind her with a smaller, more hesitant smile.

Blaine slowly sat down on the bed, still clad in his army uniform and combat boots. He put his hand on the bedspread and looked down at it for a moment before he lifted up his legs on the bed and lay down his head on the soft pillow on his side of the bed.

"Are you tired honey?" Kurt asked and tilted his head to the side.

Blaine looked up at his family then like he had forgotten that they were still there, and patted the spot on the bed next to him. "Come get in the bed everyone" He said and opened an arm for Daisy to crawl into the bed. She grinned and got in next to him, putting her little head on his shoulder. "Dada, come here" She said and waved Kurt over. Kurt chuckled and walked over to the bed. He gently put Michael down first next to Daisy and then lay down next to them.

Then they were silent. They just lay there together. At one point Michael fell asleep and Daisy whispered "This is fun." Kurt couldn't tell if she was sarcastic or not because he wouldn't necessarily classify this as fun but she seemed excited so he guessed she genuinely thought that laying in a bed with her brother and fathers were fun.

After what must have been at least ten or fifteen minutes Daisy started to squirm. "Can I get up Dada?" She turned her head to look at Kurt before glancing back at Blaine who had had his eyes kept trained on the ceiling the entire time. "Dad, it's not bedtime yet, silly"

* * *

Eventually they got out of bed and down to the kitchen to make dinner. Michael and Daisy watched cartoons on the TV in the living room and Blaine stayed upstairs in their bedroom, telling Kurt that he needed to wash up from the long flight.

Dinner was quiet. The kids told Blaine about what had happened in school since he went off to war and Blaine nodded while he ate, occasionally making a comment or asking a question. Mostly he was just quiet.

* * *

Later that night when it was time to go to bed, Kurt walked into the bathroom to find a startled Blaine staring at him. He was shirtless and in the middle of shaving his face so he had white foam on his chin and jaw. "I locked the door" He frowned and kept his hard stare trained on Kurt.

Kurt swallowed and nodded. "The lock is broken. We haven't come around to fix it yet."

Blaine nodded slowly and turned back to shaving. He rinsed off his shaver before bringing it up to his face again.

Kurt looked at him for another few seconds before he brought his eyes down to Blaine's naked back. It was covered in red scars. Some of them were fading and some of them looked like they had just started to heal. Kurt had to swallow down the lump in his throat. This was just yet another proof of what Blaine had been through. It wasn't enough that he was reminded every time he looked into his husbands eyes, no, this was a secret, permanent reminder too.

He slowly walked forward and placed his hand gently on Blaine's back. The second Kurt touched him Blaine froze. Kurt noticed it but he ignored it as he started to trace one of the older scars with his index finger. "Blaine…" He whispered and pressed a small kiss to Blaine's shoulder. "Does it-"

"Stop."

Kurt froze and looked up into the mirror where he could see that Blaine had closed his eyes and clenched his jaw. "I'm gonna finish shaving." He said with a hard edge in his voice.

Kurt slowly removed his hands from Blaine's back and nodded silently before turning around and walking out of the bathroom.

* * *

**I'm gonna post an extra chapter containing what happened to Blaine when he was missing as soon as I've finished it. This was a breeze to write but I think the next part is gonna be hard so don't expect it to be up within the next week. **

**Reviews are lovely. **

**Also, please keep in mind that this is still Kurtbastian endgame. **


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